Friday Funnies

I recently had to choose a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age.

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I will live to be 80?" He asked: Do you smoke tobacco or drink alcoholic beverages?" "Oh no," I replied. "I don't do drugs, either."

"Do you have many friends and entertain frequently?" "I said, "No, I usually stay home and keep to myself". "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?" I said, "No, my other doctor said that all red meat is unhealthy!"

"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?" "No, I don't," I said. "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?"

"No," I said. "I don't do any of those things."

He looked at me and said, "Then why do you give a shit?