Thursday, July 24, 2008

My Birthday Post

I couldn't think of an appropriate post, so I'll post a laugh!

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold
while you chop.

2. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the
shower. **My Favorite**

3. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few
minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. **Also My Favorite**

4. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you From
rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

5. If you have a bad cough , take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be
afraid to cough.

6. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and
should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

7. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Daily Thought:
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.

h/t to Reader Michelle

7 comments:

Dawn said...

My Favorite: If you have a bad cough take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
hahahahahahahah!
Happy Birthday!

Jessica said...

Happy Birthday! :D

I like the daily thought...that is awesome!

meleah rebeccah said...

I need #4 Stat.

wait...what is this BIRTHDAY news???

Dazd said...

Dawn - TY

Jessica - TY

Meleah - Its not news really. I didn't see it on CNN LOL

ordinaryjanet said...

#7 is so true!

Teresa said...

Nice Midwestern common sense.

Mrs. Who said...

Holy crap...I'm so late for your birthday. Hope you had a great one!