Friday, June 29, 2007

One Year Anniversary

June 30, 2006 I opened this little corner of the blogosphere called Dazed and Confuzed from Here. I started it all off with this post. As I wrote that post, I had really no clue how this site would develop nor if I would continue. So many unknowns that I almost decided after the first post to quit. But then Cindi, Hoosierboy and Jerry left me words of encouragement.

July went along smoothly for the nOObie and I started gaining a daily readership. Although it was only 10 or so...I was pleased with myself. My blogroll started to expand and I found new friends along the way. August rolled along and I was hitting my stride, developing a style. And amazingly people seemed to enjoy the writing. And just as I was hitting my peak in writing, there was a setback. (Hint: Read the Haloscan Comments) I followed up with this post when I got home. I was completely surprised with how many people emailed me, posted comments and left words of support on their own site. That right there folks..brought a tear to my eyes. I had been adopted into a family, and that's fine! Now if I can just get them to pay support I'd be set. Friendships were forged that day and many continue on today.

I will confess that my writing stride suffered, at least from my perspective. Even today I struggle with writing and finding topics. That is mostly caused by time constraints and lack of mental stimulation. I sometimes get so wrapped within myself I forget to write. And even when I do write, I feel like something is lacking. Thats why I spend hours a week finding funny cartoons, caption pics for contests and trivia information. Yes it lacks writing style and creativity...but you know what? I don't care...they make me laugh and gives me a satisfaction I can never explain. And that's why I started this place, for me.

I have thoroughly enjoyed writing and posting the content contained within these four corners. I have written posts that amazed me, saddened me and left me wanting to write more. And now my blogroll is so immense I can spend upwards of 4 hours a day reading them all. And I try very hard to read each one every day. Because I learned early on that without you, my dear readers, this place would be nothing.

I have made so many friends here...each one has a special place within my heart and soul. You know who you are, no need to spell names. Besides, if I missed someone I'd be crushed and completely humiliated. I hope to remain here for many years to come. I also hope my friends remain and provide me the support and strength to continue everyday. After 372 posts and over 12,000 visitors, I'd be crazy to walk away.

How does one start writing their first post for a second year? You know the one...the one that maintains the unheralded greatness, humbly speaking of course.

Posted a day early since I'll be celebrating my One Year Anniversary away from home. Make sure, as always, to check out the great reads listed here at Dazed and Confuzed from Here. Or take the time to read the archives and leave a comment, on this post, your favorite post here at Dazed and Confuzed from Here.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Thursday Night Haunts

Crossroads Paranormal Radio Link

Tonight at 9 EST on Crossroads Paranormal Radio Barb Powell of Sacred Connections will be joining us. We will be taking your calls and you can ask Barb ONE question. Please remember our show is one hour in length and we will get to as many calls as possible.

Barb is a psychic medium since birth, she has conscious memories of spirit communication since the age of 5. Barb resides in Canada.

If you can't make the live show, you can always go to Crossroads Paranormal Radio where you can listen to the archive, subscribe via RSS into ITunes and check out upcoming shows.

Here is the link for a Crossroads Paranormal Forum. Lots of good people here...

I promised a few readers back a couple of months ago I'd start posting sites with paranormal topics. Here is a great place to start...who knows, you may even see someone claiming to be me!

Thursday Take-out

There are days when surfing the internets proves valuable. Then there are days like today where you stumble upon something that makes you go Hmmmm.

So answer me this dear readers, what is it?


Leslie guessed the correct answer for the picture. Good job! "I think it's a Russian tea glass holder."

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Humpy Goodness

Sorry Ralph...At least I thought of you! bwhahahahaha

Sucks to be him...

Double click the last one...Pray that it works or I'm gonna cuss along time about my work connection.

I got nothing...have a great Hump Day!

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Riddle Me This...

Pro wrestler Benoit kills wife, son, then self
Police investigating whether ex-champion's use of steroids was cause...
The WWE canceled its live “Monday Night RAW” card in Corpus Christi, Texas, and USA Network aired a three-hour tribute to Benoit in place of the scheduled wrestling telecast.

So we celebrated a man who killed his wife and child with a 3 hour Special?!?!?!?!?!

How is Chris Benoit any different than...

Bail revoked for man accused of killing family
Illinoisan initially not considered suspect after wife, children shot in SUV

Or maybe this one...
$5 million bond for suspect in woman’s death
Boyfriend charged with murder; friend of his held on obstruction charge

Tell me folks...have we been manipulated by the media? Do TV personalities become immortals overnight? Yes we celebrated a man who obviously was a great wrestler and great entertainer. But how can we desensitize the murder, by his own hands, of his family? Does his celebrity status make it ok to murder? Oh you've not heard the last about this one. I can see a sanity statement because of steroid abuse. Well the dumba$$ was using an illegal of a substance. That makes it ok...he's a celebrity and was doing drugs...A Ok in my book. NOT!!!

WTF am I missing here?....

Offbeat Tuesday

-A cough releases an explosive charge of air that moves at speeds up to 60 mph.
-A healthy individual releases 3.5 oz. of gas in a single flatulent emission, or about 17 oz. in a day. says healthy!
-A person will die from total lack of sleep sooner than from starvation. Death will occur about 10 days without sleep, while starvation takes a few weeks.
-According to German researchers, the risk of heart attack is higher on Monday than any other day of the week. I can relate...and its absolutely correct!
-After spending hours working at a computer display, look at a blank piece of white paper. It will probably appear pink. Consuming too much booze has the same effect...try it!
-Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood we have only 206 in our bodies.
-Blood sucking hookworms inhabit 700 million people worldwide. Ewwwwww...just ewwwwwww!!!
-By the time you turn 70, your heart will have beat some two-and-a-half billion times (figuring on an average of 70 beats per minute.)
-It takes 17 muscles to smile...43 to frown.
-Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
-On average women say 7,000 words per day. Men manage just over 2000. No comment...
-The average human produces 25,000 quarts of spit in a lifetime, enough to fill two swimming pools. TMI TMI
-The human body has over 600 muscles, 40% of the body's weight.
-The human brain is about 85% water. See mom, all those times you told me there was water between my ears, you were right!
-The most common blood type in the world is Type O. The rarest, Type A-H, has been found in less than a dozen people since the type was discovered.
-The sound of a snore (up to 69 decibels) can be almost as loud as the noise of a pneumatic drill. I hope the wife doesn't see this!
-There are 45 miles of nerves in the skin of a human being.
-There are 60,000 miles of blood vessels in the human body.

Ok Health Class, there will be a test next Tuesday! It counts for 50% of your grade. bwhahahahaha

Monday, June 25, 2007

Caption It!

Let's all take a moment....awwwwwwww how cute!

Leave your captions in the comments. Winners will be announced Friday.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Caption It Winners

Originally posted here.

First Place: Lavrov: Who do you think you are? Condi: I'm the bitch that's gonna come over there and slap your face, you cracker. Mrs. Who

Second Place: Rice: I ain’t gonna... Lavrov: Smell my finger first then I’ll tell you where it was… Rice: If I could reach you, I'd slap you! DNR

Third Place: NO--It's "melts in your mouth NOT in your hand", Condi! Reader Michelle

Honorable Mention: "Did you just say that I look like a transexual?" Catherine

Watch for tomorrow's Caption It contest!

Friday, June 22, 2007

Fridays Follies

Still time to participate in this weeks Caption Contest!

And as a bonus...hit the "Read More" button for music videos.

Fergie...thanks to La Diosa del Mar for getting me hooked on this song. heh

Maroon 5

A classic...Supertramp circa 1974

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Terrific Thursday

Certainly day before Friday!!! And today is officially the first day of summer. According to the scientific types, it will occur at 2:06 P.M. EDT. According to my weather reports, it was officially summer a couple of weeks ago with this heat. Also on this day, it will be the longest day of the year and subsequentially the shortest night. If its the longest day of the year why am I still short on time?

Wacky Words not used every day...
Slubberdegullion:A sloven.
Harengiform: Shaped like a herring.
Quaquaversal: Pointing in every direction.
Hircine: Having a goaty smell. (You smell baaaaad)
Galleanthropy: The delusion that one is a cat.
Forficulation: The sensation of earwigs crawling over the skin.

Thoughts to Ponder:
Why did the kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Have you seen the commercial that shows a detergent that can handle bloodstains? It's such a violent image. Personally, I think that if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, then perhaps laundry isn't your biggest problem. First, you need to get rid of the body, then worry about the wash.

And here's my closer...
It was the last day of the school year, and Miss Figpot was talking to her fourth grade class. She asked "What will you be doing this summer?"
"Me and my family will go to the beach a lot," Suzie answered.
"That sounds like fun," said Miss Figpot. "How about you, Emma? What will you do this summer?"
"My family just bought new bikes will ride together." Emma replied enthusiastically.
"That sounds lovely," said the teacher. She continued with all her students until she got to Little Johnny in the back of the room.
"What will you do this summer, Johnny?"
"Nothing," Little Johnny responded timidly.
"Nothing? Aren't you going to do anything with your family?" she asked, trying to get Little Johnny to use his imagination.
"Nothing." He replied
"Will you go to the beach?"
"Will you ride bikes?"
"No, never!" Little Johnny burst out. "We can never ride bikes together!"
"Why not?" said the shocked Miss Figpot.
"I don't know," explained Little Johnny, "But dad always says, when mom and sis start 'cycling together', it's time to get the hell out of town."

Have a terrific Thursday!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Wacky Wednesday

I've been tagged by two ladies for another Meme...Tall Cool One and The Coffee Lady. Both had similarities but different questions. So I combined the two.

INSTRUCTIONS: Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so.

(1) Dear Bastards...
(2) Random Bullarcky
(3) Cynical_Bastard
(4) Cynical_Bastard
(5) Dazdnconfzd

Select five people to tag:
I'll let those play that wanna play. Just come back and tell me you did, k?

What were you doing 10 years ago? (5 Things)
1. Turning 32
2. Celebrating my sons 1st B-day
3. Starting my endless cycle of cholesterol diets
4. Slowly becoming a Dad
5. Goodness...its 10 years ago!

What were you doing 1 year ago? (5 Things)
1. Stressing out
2. Contemplating working 2 jobs
3. Celebrating sons 10th B-day
4. Going on vacation
5. turning 41

Five snacks you enjoy:
1. Snickers!
2. M&Ms
3. Frosty
4. Pretzels
5. Trail Mix

Five songs that you know all the lyrics to:
1. Back in Black
2. Stairway to Heaven
3. Dazed and Confused (duh)
4. Piano Man
5. Amazing Grace

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1. I'm going to Disney World!!!!
2. Hide as much as I can from the missus
3. Buy a cabin in the mountains away from all the relatives that will come out of the woodwork like cockroaches
4. Donate money
5. Treat myself to something I've always wanted. My very own set of tools. NEW!!!

Five things you like doing:
1. Blogging and reading blogs
2. Making people laugh
3. Outdoor enjoying Nature
4. Driving
5. Enjoying a fine glass of wine

Five things you would never wear again:
1. flip flops. Gotdamn things hurt my feet
2. Bicycle shorts
3. 3 piece suit
4. I'll never see a shirt size of small again.
5. Black socks with sandals. heh

Five favorite toys:
1. My computer
2. My guns
3. My GPS
4. Remote Control car
5. Slinky

Five Things You Hate To Do:
1. Crowds.
2. Cleaning a toilet
3. Using a public restroom
4. Burying a beloved pet.
5. Dishes

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Offbeat Tuesday

A hippopotamus can run faster than a man can.

A Holstein's spots are like a fingerprint or snowflake. No two cows have exactly the same pattern of spots.

A honey bee must tap two million flowers to make one pound of honey

A honey bee travels an estimated 43,000 miles to gather one pound of honey. A pound of honey consists of 29,184 drops.

A honeybee can fly at fifteen miles per hour.

A horse can sleep standing up.

A Horse has 18 more bones than a Human.

A human being loses an average of 40 to 100 strands of hair a day.

A human has a bone just after the spine ends, which helps proves that humans once had tails.

A human head remains conscious for about 15 to 20 seconds after it is been decapitated.

A human's scent membrane in the nose is about the size of a postage stamp. A dog's is about the size of a handkerchief. It's olfactory lobe is also 4 times that of a human.

A humming bird flaps its wings up to 90 times in one second or over 5000 times a minute.

A hummingbird weighs less than a penny.

About 10% of the world's population is left-handed.

About 10,000,000 people have the same birthday as you.

About 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens each year.

About 20% of bird species have become extinct in the past 200 years, almost all of them because of human activity.

About 200,000,000 M&Ms are sold each day in the United States.

About 24% of the total ground area of Los Angeles is said to be committed to automobiles.

About 55% of all movies are rated R. About 500 movies are made in the US and 800 in India annually.

About 70% of Americans who go to college do it just to make more money.

About 75% of the people in the U.S. live on 2% land.

About 80% of the city was burned in the Great Fire of London in 1666.

About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they're still sitting on it.

About one-tenth of the earth's surface is permanently covered with ice.

Justice is Best Served Cold

The Duke prosecutor, Mike Nifong, for the alleged rape case is getting his just rewards.

Now how about serving some justice to the nutcase that cried rape in the first place?

Monday, June 18, 2007

Caption It!

Leave your captions in the comments. Winner will be announced Friday.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Caption Contest Winners

First Place: And here's a picture of our special tonight at Hoho's Vietnamese Cuisine.
Low in fat. High in anti-oxidants. Exotic...but accessible. And nutritionally correct. All served headless, of course. Jenny
Second Place: A couple of quack ho's confront the pussy that's invading their turf. Hammer
Third Place: Beat it, you're not the kind of pussy we're looking for. Rex

Honorable Mention: Ok Sam, let's try this one more time. It goes like this: Aaaaaaaaflac! Dazd
OK, which one of you called me 'the ugly duckling'? DNR

This was one of the toughest caption contests to choose. All the captions were great and I almost posted them all. I will say this though, cmk had the best comment..."so I will just have to say, 'Awwwwwwww!" And all the captions are all so bad too .. for such a cute pic.

Watch Monday for a new one!

Saturday Meme

Tall Cool Drink of Water has a meme posted. Seemed easy enough to play until I got into it.

Not that I'm aware of...

The night I had my heart attack. But it was from relief I was still alive.

It gets the job accomplished.


Yes. Lil Dazd is 11.

Yes. Altho I'd set myself in my place first.

Dr. Smart A$$ is my nickname.

No, removed when I was 6.


Raisin Bran

Tennis shoes yes.


Oreo Blizzard

When we meet or shake hands, do they look me in the eye.



My Uncle

Gray shorts and barefoot.


Blah Blah TV




Tennis, football, basketball, baseball, NASCAR




Snickers bar

Happy Endings

The Replacements




Sweet Raisin Pie

Who knows...

A dead person.


Don't use one.

The Replacements

A well executed belch.



Not that I know of

Indianapolis, Indiana

Whoever wants to play

Friday, June 15, 2007

Friday Funnies

Confucius Say:
PC geek must master joystick as fisherman masters bait.

Man who grows cabbages and peas in same plot most unhygenic.


There was a woman who was interested in getting a boob job, so she went to her doctor, Dr. Smith and questioned him about implants. He explained that, before you do anything too serious, there is a method that has worked for a lot of my patients. Every morning when you wake up rub your boobs and say "Scoobie doobie doobie, give me bigger boobies." She did this faithfully for weeks and noticed one day that they actually were getting bigger, she was very impressed.
One morning she woke up, late for work and very rushed. By the time she got on the bus she realized that she forgot to go through her routine. So standing on the bus, while rubbing her boobs she says "Scoobie doobie doobie, give me bigger boobies". The man standing next to her says, "You go to Dr. Smith?" "Yes," she said, "how did you know?" He replies "Hickory dickory dock!"


who's there?
atch who?
Bless you!!!

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Madame who?
Madame foot got stuck in the elevator!


All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case.....coincidence?
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism... to steal from many is research.
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Thursday What-Nots

Gotta love this one...lovely, wouldn't you say?

Perverts...its lunchtime that why its lovely. Geeeeesh!

June 14th, Flag Day

The Fourth of July was traditionally celebrated as America's birthday, but the idea of an annual day specifically celebrating the Flag is believed to have first originated in 1885. BJ Cigrand, a schoolteacher, arranged for the pupils in the Fredonia, Wisconsin Public School, District 6, to observe June 14 (the 108th anniversary of the official adoption of The Stars and Stripes) as 'Flag Birthday'. In numerous magazines and newspaper articles and public addresses over the following years, Cigrand continued to enthusiastically advocate the observance of June 14 as 'Flag Birthday', or 'Flag Day'.

On June 14, 1889, George Balch, a kindergarten teacher in New York City, planned appropriate ceremonies for the children of his school, and his idea of observing Flag Day was later adopted by the State Board of Education of New York. On June 14, 1891, the Betsy Ross House in Philadelphia held a Flag Day celebration, and on June 14 of the following year, the New York Society of the Sons of the Revolution, celebrated Flag Day.

Following the suggestion of Colonel J Granville Leach (at the time historian of the Pennsylvania Society of the Sons of the Revolution), the Pennsylvania Society of Colonial Dames of America on April 25, 1893 adopted a resolution requesting the mayor of Philadelphia and all others in authority and all private citizens to display the Flag on June 14th. Leach went on to recommend that thereafter the day be known as 'Flag Day', and on that day, school children be assembled for appropriate exercises, with each child being given a small Flag.

Two weeks later on May 8th, the Board of Managers of the Pennsylvania Society of Sons of the Revolution unanimously endorsed the action of the Pennsylvania Society of Colonial Dames. As a result of the resolution, Dr. Edward Brooks, then Superintendent of Public Schools of Philadelphia, directed that Flag Day exercises be held on June 14, 1893 in Independence Square. School children were assembled, each carrying a small Flag, and patriotic songs were sung and addresses delivered.

In 1894, the governor of New York directed that on June 14 the Flag be displayed on all public buildings. With BJ Cigrand and Leroy Van Horn as the moving spirits, the Illinois organization, known as the American Flag Day Association, was organized for the purpose of promoting the holding of Flag Day exercises. On June 14th, 1894, under the auspices of this association, the first general public school children's celebration of Flag Day in Chicago was held in Douglas, Garfield, Humboldt, Lincoln, and Washington Parks, with more than 300,000 children participating.

Adults, too, participated in patriotic programs. Franklin K. Lane, Secretary of the Interior, delivered a 1914 Flag Day address in which he repeated words he said the flag had spoken to him that morning: "I am what you make me; nothing more. I swing before your eyes as a bright gleam of color, a symbol of yourself."

Inspired by these three decades of state and local celebrations, Flag Day - the anniversary of the Flag Resolution of 1777 - was officially established by the Proclamation of President Woodrow Wilson on May 30th, 1916. While Flag Day was celebrated in various communities for years after Wilson's proclamation, it was not until August 3rd, 1949, that President Truman signed an Act of Congress designating June 14th of each year as National Flag Day.

Information courtesy of

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Memorable Moment

Date: September 1984
Location: Central Indiana

This year was a memorable year as I graduated high school, had a full time job and owned a 1968 Mustang. What a sweet ride that car was especially during warm weather. It was your basic Mustang with nothing fancy added. I wasn't into chrome parts, especially chromed rims or anything like most people enjoy. Nope...just appreciated the beauty of a classic stock car from the late 60's. Yes I had my eye on a '67 Camaro but decided I didn't want a muscle car. I wanted a car that was sleek yet when needed could pull an 1/8 mile run worthy of any competitor. Metaphorically, a wolf in sheeps clothing.

The only thing that wasn't stock was the sound system. Sweet! I don't remember all the makes and models, but I'll tell you people heard me coming 1/4 mile away. lol I had a Pioneer AM/FM Cassette stereo connected to a 10 band equalizer/100 amplifier. Of course I had two speakers just to handle all that juice. When it was cranked, the car vibrated and you were basically deaf for days. And just so you know, I've not grown out of that love for thundering tunes properly equalized. There is nothing like it...

One evening cruising through back country roads I had Van Halen's album 1984 blaring. "Panama" rocked and so did "Top Jimmy" along with all the other great songs. Like who can forget, amongst us guys, the video for "Hot for Teacher"? Not only did the song kick a$$ but the video did as well. I came thundering into a small town about 20 miles south of Indianapolis and barely slowed down from my cruising speed of 50 mph. I knew the townspeople so I wasn't worried about getting a ticket...Grandma knew the town marshall. He and I had been fishing many times and were friends albeit different generations. As I came into the center of town I slowed down to navigate the treacherous railroad crossing. I slowed down to 40 mph and braced myself for a bumpy crossing. Music is still thundering and I'm singing away!

I never heard the train whistle nor looked both ways before roaring across. It wasn't until my back-end lost traction and I spun 180 degrees did I see the train. The wind force of the train moving at 60 mph spun my '68 'Stang around like it was a Matchbox car. I even found a scratch on my trunks backside that came from the train. I light scratch as if I'd been keyed. I surmized it came from something on the train. Actually I didn't want to know...

Ever since that day, each railroad crossing I come to I make sure my radio is turned down and I look both ways. Even if Van Halens "Top Jimmy" is playing...

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Offbeat Tuesday

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious."

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without kneecaps They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

If the population of China walked past you, 8 abreast, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

H/T to reader Michelle!

Monday, June 11, 2007

Caption It!

Leave your captions in the comments. Winner will be announced Friday.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Caption Contest Winners

First Place: Sorry about your tongue, but I didn't think you'd take the 'kiss my ass' suggestion literally. Mrs. Who

Second Place: Believing in multi-cultural relationships, Fluffy did her best to give Spike a blowjob and ended up with a quill in her tongue. barista

Third Place: tastes like chicken. Ordinary Janet

Sunday Reflections

I received the following via e-mail this weekend. I cannot verify the authenticity but I can verify the BMS factor. (Blurry Monitor Syndrome) As a family member who had/has family serving overseas, these kind of heroics are what the MSM doesn't cover. Next time you see a soldier, walk up and shake their hand and thank them for your freedom.

Asa Company, Southwest Airlines is going to support "Red Fridays." Last week I was in Atlanta, Georgia attending a conference. While I was in the airport, returning home, I heard several people behind me beginning to clap and cheer. I immediately turned around and witnessed one of the greatest acts of patriotism I have ever seen.

Moving thru the terminal was a group of soldiers in their camos. As they began heading to their gate, everyone (well almost everyone) was abruptly to their feet with their hands waving and cheering. When I saw the soldiers, probably 30-40 of them, being applauded and cheered for, it hit me. I'm not alone. I'm not the only red-blooded American who still loves this country and supports our troops and their families. Of course I immediately stopped and began clapping for these young unsung heroes who are putting their lives on the line everyday for us so we can go to school, work and home without fear or reprisal. Just when I thought I could not be more proud of my country or of our service men and women, a young girl, not more than 6 or 7 years old, ran up to one of the male soldiers. He kneeled down and said "hi." The little girl then asked him if he would give something to her daddy for her. The young soldier, who didn't look any older than maybe 22 himself, said he would try and what did she want to give to her daddy. Then suddenly the little girl grabbed the neck of this soldier, gave him the biggest hug she could muster and then kissed him on the cheek.

The mother of the little girl, who said her daughter's name was Courtney, told the young soldier that her husband was a Marine and had been in Iraq for 11 months now. As the mom was explaining how much her daughter Courtney missed her father, the young soldier began to tear up. When this temporarily single mom was done explaining her situation, all of the soldiers huddled together for a brief second. Then one of the other servicemen pulled out a military-looking walkie-talkie. They started playing with the device and talking back and forth on it. After about 10-15 seconds of this, the young soldier walked back over to Courtney, bent down and said this to her, "I spoke to your daddy and he told me to give this to you." He then hugged this little girl that he had just met and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He finished by saying "your daddy told me to tell you that he loves you more than anything and he is coming home very soon." The mom at this point was crying almost uncontrollably and as the young soldier stood to his feet, he saluted Courtney and her mom. I was standing no more than 6 feet away from this entire event. As the soldiers began to leave, heading towards their gate, people resumed their applause. As I stood there applauding and looked around, there were very few dry eyes, including my own. That young soldier in one last act of selflessness, turned around and blew a kiss to Courtney with a tear rolling down his cheek. We need to remember everyday all of our soldiers and their families and thank God for them and their sacrifices. At the end of the day, it's good to be an American.

RED FRIDAYS ----- Very soon, you will see a great many people wearing
Red every Friday. The reason? Americans who support our troops used to be called the "silent majority". We are no longer silent, and are voicing our love for God, country and home in record breaking numbers. We are not organized, boisterous or over-bearing. We get no liberal media coverage on TV, to reflect our message or our opinions. Many Americans, like you, me and all our friends, simply want to recognize that the vast majority of America supports our troops. Our idea of showing solidarity and support for our troops with dignity and respect starts this Friday -and continues each and every Friday until the troops all come home, sending a deafening message that.. Every red-blooded American who supports our men and women afar will wear something red. By word of mouth, press, TV -- let's make the United States on every Friday a sea of red much like a homecoming football game in the bleachers. If every one of us who loves this country will share this with acquaintances, co-workers, friends, and family. It will not be long before the USA is covered in RED and it will let our troops know the once "silent" majority is on their side more than ever; certainly more than the media lets on.

The first thing a soldier says when asked "What can we do to make things better for you?" is...We need your support and your prayers.

Let's get the word out and lead with class and dignity, by example; and wear something red every Friday.



~Don't Let Weeds Grow Around Your Dreams~

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Saturday Ramblings

Damn good thing the weekend is here. It's a beautiful day outside and I've lots to accomplish. It seems I can never finish my projects. Yes I realize procrastination plays a small role...ok a large role but I'm hopeful todays chores will be completed in a timely manner.

There was a place and time I lived for staying busy. I was so overwhelmed with projects and social committments that others figured I never slept. But I lived for this...its what kept me alive. And now...not so much. I keep busy and sometimes overwhelm myself. But I've learned, especially after last September, that I occassionally need serious down time. And this down time allows me to recharge my batteries, clear my head and reduce stress levels.

This weekend its just me and the dog. The family went away this weekend and will return on Sunday. Yes I miss them already and wish I would've went along, but I needed my down time. So the dog and I enjoyed breakfast this morning, her with dog food and a treat and I with a bagel with cream cheese. I politely asked if she'd share her breakfast and I was quickly awarded with "The Look". I'm now certain the missus has been teaching the dog some of her tricks.

After completing my chores today, I have a guys movie day all planned. I plan on watching Saving Private Ryan followed by Braveheart finishing with either The Outlaw Josey Wales or The Dog Whisperer. We'll see just how much of "The Look" the missus has taught this dog.

Have a great weekend and make sure to check out all the NEW links in the blogroll. Not quite a gazillion added yet but last count was a bazillion. I'm not finished adding them keep checking back for new ones. And as always, I'm sure you won't be disappointed with my selections for you, my dear readers.

Friday, June 08, 2007

Friday Funnies

This one you may have to double click and open in another window for it to work properly.

Make sure to go wish Becky a Happy Birthday today!

On a "not so funny note", I sincerely apologize to my feed readers. I have been informed all the posts I labeled last night were sent in today's feed. I feel like a dumba$$...

Thursday, June 07, 2007


Help...I have a gazillion links I want to add. So you dear readers, all 5 of you, I need your advice/opinion/expertise in this matter.

Would you like to see them all down the side...a gazillion of them?

Or should I use that neat little nifty trick like Ambulance Driver has under Reciprocated Linky Love?

Or maybe you have a neat little nifty trick of your own you'd like to share!

Now if you all decide the neat little nifty trick, then who can hook a brother up?

Anyone?.........Hello?.........[tap tap]This thing on?

Ps. Who has photoshop abilities that can hook a brother up by tomorrow?

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Amnesty Bill

Found this information interesting. Found it here, who found it here, who found it here.

More after the "Read More" tag if you don't like link jumping. It's a long read but very informative.

20 Loopholes in the Senate Immigration Bill

Loophole 1 – Legal Status Before Enforcement:

Amnesty benefits do not wait for the “enforcement trigger.” After filing an application and waiting 24 hours, illegal aliens will receive full “probationary benefits,” complete with the ability to legally live and work in the U.S., travel outside of the U.S. and return, and their own social security card. Astonishingly, if the trigger is never met and amnesty applications are therefore never “approved,” the probationary benefits granted to the illegal alien population never expire, and the new social security cards issued to the illegal alien population are not revoked. [See pp. 1, 290-291, & 315].

Loophole 2 – U.S. VISIT Exit Not In Trigger:

The “enforcement trigger,” required to be met before the new temporary worker program begins, does not require that the exit portion of U.S. VISIT system – the biometric border check-in/check-out system first required by Congress in 1996 that is already well past its already postponed 2005 implementation due date – to be in place before new worker or amnesty programs begin. Without the U.S. VISIT exit portion, the U.S. has no method to ensure that workers (or their visiting families) do not overstay their visas. Our current illegal population contains 4 to 5.5 million visa overstays, therefore, we know that the U.S. VISIT exit component is key to a successful new temporary worker program. [See pp. 1-2].

Loophole 3 – Trigger Requires No More Agents, Beds, or Fencing Than Current Law:

The “enforcement trigger” does not require the Department of Homeland Security to have detention space sufficient to end “catch and release” at the border and in the interior. Even after the adoption of amendment 1172, the trigger merely requires the addition of 4,000 detention beds, bringing DHS to a 31,500 bed capacity. This is far short of the 43,000 beds required under current law to be in place by the end of 2007, or the additional 20,000 beds required later in the bill. Additionally, the bill establishes a “catch, pay, and release” program. This policy will benefit illegal aliens from countries other than Mexico that are caught at the border, then can post a $5,000 bond, be released and never show up for deportation hearings. Annual failure to appear rates for 2005 and 2006, caused in part by lack of detention space, doubled the 2004 rate (106,000 – 110,000 compared with 54,000). Claims that the bill “expands fencing” are inaccurate. The bill only requires 370 miles of fencing to be completed, while current law already mandates that more than 700 miles be constructed [See pp. 1-2, & 10-11, and EOIR’s FY2006 Statistical Yearbook, p. H2, and The Secure Fence Act of 2004].

Loophole 4 -- Three Additional Years Worth of Illegal Aliens Granted Status, Treated Preferentially To Legal Filers:

Aliens who broke into the country illegally a mere 5 months ago, are treated better than foreign nationals who legally applied to come to the U.S. more than two years ago. Aliens who can prove they were illegally in the U.S. on January 1, 2007, are immediately eligible to apply from inside the U.S. for amnesty benefits, while foreign nationals that filed applications to come to the U.S. after May 1, 2005 must start the application process over again from their home countries. Last year’s bill required illegal aliens to have been here before January 7, 2004 to qualify for permanent legal status. [See pp. 263, 282, & 306].

Loophole 5 – Completion of Background Checks Not Required For Probationary Legal Status:

Legal status must be granted to illegal aliens 24 hours after they file an application, even if the aliens have not yet “passed all appropriate background checks.” (Last year’s bill gave DHS 90 days to check an alien’s background before any status was granted). No legal status should be given to any illegal alien until all appropriate background checks are complete. [See pp. 290].

Loophole 6 – Some Child Molesters Are Still Eligible:

Some aggravated felons – those who have sexually abused a minor – are eligible for amnesty. A child molester who committed the crime before the bill is enacted is not barred from getting amnesty if their conviction document omitted the age of the victim. The bill corrects this loophole for future child molesters, but does not close the loophole for current or past convictions. [See p. 47: 30-33, & p. 48: 1-2]

Loophole 7 – Terrorism Connections Allowed, Good Moral Character Not Required:

Illegal aliens with terrorism connections are not barred from getting amnesty. An illegal alien seeking most immigration benefits must show “good moral character.” Last year’s bill specifically barred aliens with terrorism connections from having “good moral character” and being eligible for amnesty. This year’s bill does neither. Additionally, bill drafters ignored the Administration’s request that changes be made to the asylum, cancellation of removal, and withholding of removal statutes in order to prevent aliens with terrorist connections from receiving relief. [Compare §204 in S. 2611 from the 109th Congress with missing §204 on p. 48 of S.A. 1150, & see missing subsection (5) on p. 287 of S.A. 1150].

Loophole 8 – Gang Members Are Eligible:

Instead of ensuring that members of violent gangs such as MS 13 are deported after coming out of the shadows to apply for amnesty, the bill will allow violent gang members to get amnesty as long as they “renounce” their gang membership on their application. [See p. 289: 34-36].

Loophole 9 – Absconders Are Eligible:

Aliens who have already had their day in court – those subject to final orders of removal, voluntary departure orders, or reinstatement of their final orders of removal – are eligible for amnesty under the bill. The same is true for aliens who have made a false claim to citizenship or engaged in document fraud. More than 636,000 alien fugitives could be covered by this loophole. [See p. 285:19-22 which waives the following inadmissibility grounds: failure to attend a removal proceeding; final orders of removal for alien smuggling; aliens unlawfully present after previous immigration violations or deportation orders; and aliens previously removed. This appears to conflict with language on p. 283:40-41. When a direct conflict appears in a statute, the statue is interpreted by the courts to the benefit of the alien.].

Loophole 10 – Learning English Not Required For A Decade:

Illegal aliens are not required to demonstrate any proficiency in English for more than a decade after they are granted amnesty. Learning English is not required for an illegal alien to receive probationary benefits, the first 4-year Z visa, or the second 4-year Z visa. The first Z visa renewal (the second 4-year Z visa) requires only that the alien demonstrate an “attempt” to learn English by being “on a waiting list for English classes.” Passing a basic English test is required only for a second Z visa renewal (the third 4-year Z visa), and even then the alien only has to pass the test “prior to the expiration of the second extension of Z status” (12 years down the road). [See pp. 295-296].

Loophole 11 – Earned Income Tax Credit Will Cost Taxpayers Billions In Just 10 Years:

Current illegal aliens and new guest workers will be eligible for the Earned Income Tax Credit, a refundable tax credit designed to encourage American citizens and legal permanent residents to work. The Congressional Budget Office estimates that this loophole will cost the U.S. taxpayer up to $20 billion dollars in just the first 10 years after the bill’s enactment. To be consistent with the intent of the 1996 welfare reforms – which limited new immigrants from receiving public benefits until they had been legal permanent residents for five years – the bill should withhold EITC eligibility from amnestied aliens until they become legal permanent residents. Closing this loophole will save the taxpayers billions of dollars. [See p. 293 after S.A. 1190 was adopted, p. 307, p. 315, §606. All that is required for EITC eligibility is a social security number and resident alien status. Nothing in the bill’s tax provisions limit EITC eligibility. The issuance of social security numbers to aliens as soon as they apply for amnesty will ensure they are able to qualify for the EITC.]

Loophole 12 – Affidavits From Friends Accepted As Evidence:

Records from day-labor centers, labor unions, and “sworn declarations” from any non-relative (acquaintances, friends, coworkers, etc) are to be accepted as evidence that the illegal alien has satisfied the bill’s amnesty requirements. This low burden of proof will invite fraud and more illegal immigration – even aliens who are not yet in the U.S. will likely meet this burden of proof. DHS will not have the resources to examine whether the claims contained in the “sworn declarations” of the alien’s friends (that the alien was here prior to January 1, 2007 and is currently employed) are actually valid. [See p. 293: 13-16].

Loophole 13 – Taxpayer Funded Legal Counsel and Arbitration:

Free legal counsel and the fees and expenses of arbitrators will be provided to aliens that have been working illegally in agriculture. The U.S. taxpayer will fund the attorneys that help these individuals fill out their amnesty applications. Additionally, if these individuals have a dispute with their employer over whether they were fired for “just cause,” DHS will “pay the fee and expenses of the arbitrator.” [See p. 339:37-41, & p. 332: 37-38.]

Loophole 14 – In-State Tuition and Student Loans:

In-state tuition and other higher education benefits, such as Stafford Loans, will be made available to current illegal aliens that are granted initial “probationary” status, even if the same in-state tuition rates are not offered to all U.S. citizens. This would normally violate current law (8 U.S.C. §1623) which mandates that educational institutions give citizens the same postsecondary education benefits they offer to illegal aliens. [See p. 321: 8-31].

Loophole 15 – Inadequacy of the Merit System:

The “merit system,” designed to shift the U.S. green card distribution system to attract higher skilled workers that benefit the national interest, is only a shell of what it should have been. Though the merit system begins immediately, it will not increase the percentage of high skilled immigrants coming to the United States until 2016, 8 years after enactment. Of the 247,000 green cards dedicated to the merit based system each year for the first 5 years, 100,000 green cards will be reserved for low-skilled guest workers (10,000) and for clearing the current employment based green card backlog (90,000). From 2013 to 2015, the number of merit based green cards drops to 140,000, and of that number, 100,000 green cards are still reserved each year for low-skilled guest workers (10,000) and for clearing the current employment based green card backlog (90,000). Even after 2015, when the merit system really begins (in 2016) by having 380,000 green cards annually, 10,00 green cards will be reserved specifically for low skilled workers, and points will be given for many characteristics that are not considered “high-skilled.” For example, 16 points will be given for aliens in “high demand occupations” which includes janitors, maids, food preparation workers, and groundskeepers. [See p.260: 25 – p. 261: 20, p. 262, & The Department of Labor’s list of “occupations with the largest job growth” available at].

Loophole 16 – Visas For Individuals That Plan To Overstay:

The new “parent” visa contained in the bill which allows parents of citizens, and the spouses and children of new temporary workers, to visit a worker in the United States is not only a misnomer, but also an invitation for high rates of visa overstays. This new visa specifically allows the spouse and children of new temporary workers who intend to abandon their residence in a foreign country, to qualify to come to the U.S. to “visit.” The visa requires only a $1,000 bond, which will be forfeited when, not if, family members of new temporary workers decide to overstay their 30 day visit. Workers should travel to their home countries to visit their families, not the other way around. [See p. 277:1 – 33, and p. 276: 38-43].

Loophole 17 – Chain Migration Tippled Before Being Eliminated:

Though the bill will eventually eliminate chain migration (relatives other than spouses and children of citizens and legal permanent residents), it will not have full effect until 2016. Until then, chain migration into the U.S. will actually triple, from approximately 138,000 chain migrants a year (equal to 14% of the 1 million green cards the U.S. currently distributes on an annual basis) to approximately 440,000 chain migrants a year (equal to 45% of the 1 million green cards the U.S. currently distributes on an annual basis). [See pp. 260:13, p. 270: 29 – pp. 271: 17]

Loophole 18 – Back Taxes Not Required:

Last year’s bill required illegal aliens to prove they had paid three of their last five years of taxes to get amnesty. This year, payment of back taxes is not required for amnesty. The bill requires taxes to be paid at the time of application for a green card, but at that time, only proof of payment of Federal taxes (not state and local) is required for the years the alien worked on a Z visa, not the years the alien has already worked illegally in the United States. Though Senator McCain’s S.A. 1190, adopted by voice vote, claimed to “require undocumented immigrants receiving legal status to pay owed back taxes,” the amendment actually only required proof of payment of taxes for “any year during the period of employment required by subparagraph (D)(i).” Since the bill does not contain a subparagraph (D)(i), nor require any past years of employment as a prerequisite for amnesty, the amendment essentially only requires proof of payment of taxes for future work in the U.S., not payment of “back taxes.” [See p. 307, and p. 293 as altered by S.A. 1190, amendment p. 2: 19-20.]

Loophole 19 – Social Security Credits Allowed For Some Illegal Work Histories:

Aliens who came to the U.S. on legal visas, but overstayed their visas and have been working in the U.S. for years, as well as illegal aliens who apply for Z visa status but do not qualify, will be able to collect social security credits for the years they worked illegally. Under the bill, if an alien was ever issued a social security account number – all work-authorized aliens who originally came on legal visas receive these – the alien will receive Social Security credits for any “quarters of coverage” the alien worked after receiving their social security account number. Because the bill requires social security account numbers to be issued “promptly” to illegal aliens as soon as they are granted “any probationary benefits based upon application [for Z status]” (these benefits are granted 24 hours after the application is filed), an illegal alien who is denied Z visa status but continues to work illegally in the U.S. will accumulate Social Security credits. [See pp. 316:8 – 16, and pp. 315: 32-39]

Loophole 20 – Criminal Fines Not Proportional To Conduct:

The criminal fines an illegal alien is required to pay to receive amnesty are less than the bill’s criminal fines for paperwork violations committed by U.S. citizens, and can be paid by installment. Under the bill, an illegal alien must pay a $1,000 criminal fine to apply for a Z visa, and a $4,000 fine to apply for a green card. Eighty percent of those fines can be paid on an installment plan. Under the bill’s confidentiality provisions, someone who improperly handles or uses information on an alien’s amnesty application can be fined $10,000. Administration officials suggest that the bill’s “criminal fines are proportionate to the criminal conduct.” Why, then, is the fine for illegally entering, using false documents to work, and live one-tenth the fine for a paperwork violation committed by a government official? [See p. 287: 34, p. 317: 9, p. 315:6-8, & remarks made by Secretary Gutierrez on Your World with Neil Cavuto, 4:00 May 31, 2007]

Slow News Day

NEW YORK -- Christopher Woods charges he got too much of a boost -- from an energy drink called Boost Plus. He has sued the maker of the health drink, claiming the vitamin-enriched beverage gave him an erection that would not go away and caused him to be hospitalized.

Oh read that correctly! I'm thinking 30 years from now he's going to wish he had that much stamina.

The lawsuit said Woods, 29, drank the nutrition beverage, which is made by the Novartis pharmaceutical company, on June 5, 2004. Woods' court papers said he woke up the next morning "with an erection that would not subside" and sought treatment of the condition. According to court documents, Woods had surgery to relieve the condition known as severe priapism. He was implanted with a Winter shunt, which moves blood from one area to another.

His name is Woods...heh. Good thing he wasn't named Richard Woods huh? Surgery?!?!? I'm thinking a good massage or a talented woman...nevermind, I won't go there.

The lawsuit, filed late Monday, said Woods had problems that required a hospital visit and medical procedures to close blood vessels on his penis. Woods' lawsuit seeks unspecified damages. A spokeswoman for the drug company said the company did not comment on pending litigation. Novartis' Boost Plus Web site describes the drink as "a great tasting, high calorie, nutritionally complete oral supplement for people who require extra energy and protein in a limited volume."

Note to the AP, one should not use oral and high protein in the same sentence.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Worthwhile Read

Ever read something that although you know quite well you shouldn't laugh, you can't resist?

I resisted the urge to play Simon Cowell because frankly, it does not behoove one to criticize the performance of a 300 pound behemoth with homicidal tendencies, even if the behemoth does think he has found his inner Shirley Temple with his captivating performance of The Good Ship Lollipop. too. Go read it here. Make sure you read his whole site too.

A Wish for You

Wishing you a Happy Birthday with many more years to come.
Happy Birthday La Diosa del Mar!

Sooner or later we all discover that the important moments in life are not the advertised ones, not the birthdays, the graduations, the weddings, not the great goals achieved. The real milestones are less prepossessing. They come to the door of memory unannounced, stray dogs that amble in, sniff around a bit and simply never leave. Our lives are measured by these. - Susan B. Anthony

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Home Alone

This is the first weekend in 5 weeks that I can stay at home and do absolutely nothing. 5 weekends away from home is very tiring and leaves a lot to be desired concerning my yard.

So what did I do today? I slept. Not that I couldn't have worked outside today, if it weren't for the heat. Hot and muggy hot that when I threw the ball for my dog, she looked at me with that "if you want the damn thing go get it yourself" look. So needless to say we spent the day in the air conditioning. While watching the news, I saw a report on the farmers and how they are coping with the heat. A local chicken farmer was quoted as saying, "We are feeding the chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs." The dairy farmers were also concerned the milk production would cause a shortage. One farmer was quoted as saying, "We are feeding crushed ice to the cows so they won't give evaporated milk."

In other news, the local newspaper have sources that confirmed reports of a celebrity sighting. It's so hot that Angelina Jolie is considering adopting another child from here. **drum rim shot**

But seriously, its nice having downtime to let my batteries recharge. I feel refreshed this evening and have plans of doing nothing again tomorrow.

Friday, June 01, 2007

Friday Funnies

Easy way to track where someone is using their cellphone number. Use at your own risk.

Click on the link below to locate someone through their cell phone via satellite-based GPS technology. You can actually locate your significant other and see whether they are at work or elsewhere. Technology is amazing. Enter your cell phone number. It works!

Track your cell phone