Saturday, March 31, 2007

Caption Contest Winners

After judging all the comments and with advice from my talented assistant, we have chosen the winners!

Best Caption
First Place: "Mom was right, we should have gone to the laundromat to meet girls." dirk_star

Second Place:
Hey GuyK...
What Dazd????
Dazd:If we put on these caps on do you think we could read each others minds?
GuyK: Geez Dazd I don't know.We could give it a try.
Dazd: Okay...Great
GuyK: Your wanting to know where you can buy a long sleeve tye dye shirt like mine? Dazd: Holy cow GuyK you guessed what I was thinking. So GuyK where did ya get the shirt? Becky

Third Place: Do these virtual reality helmets make us look fat? Hammer

Thanks to everyone that participated. I'll try and get another one posted Monday.

Friday, March 30, 2007

Tissue Alert

BMS Warning! (Blurry Monitor Syndrome)

Have a Dilemma?

Here's what's not been brewing at Dazd Central. Lack of dilemma submissions have lead me to a decision. I decided that this will be the last posting of this Weekly Dilemma. A good idea that didn't take work. We had one that we were able to assist successfully, so it's not a total failure. ***Our first Dilemma was a success***

If you have a dilemma your worried about but feeling timid about posting to your own site, you can do it here at Dazed and Confused. Afraid that people will snicker and ridicule you? Afraid that family will discover your dilemma and domestic issues will commence? Read more by clicking the Rambling On... button.

Worry no more...Dazd has conceived a plan to overcome your fears. We all know that among the 10 comments there's a chance 1 of those is the golden nugget.

What's required from you? Nothing more than an email to me. Whats required of me? Simply picking one and posting it. Simple? Well, yes but wait! There's more...anonymity for you! That's right...anonymity!

What kind of dilemmas am I allowed to submit Dazd? Good question there Jane Doe. You can submit almost any content. However, I reserve the final decision. I'd ask that the submissions be of a "personal" nature and not something "world wide". There are plenty of sites dedicated to politics, war, racism, etc...

So Mr. Doe is cheating on you and you're not sure how to approach that he's been caught? Caught 6 year old Johnny streaking through the neighbors back yard while chanting "Here Kitty Kitty Kitty"? That person at the sub shop always scratches their nose before making your sandwich...who do you complain to?

Send me an email and let's see what the blogosphere has to say. C' can do it!

Dilemma Submitting Guidelines:
1. Submit via my email address. If your dilemma is chosen, I will reply to that email account.
2. All email addresses and origin of submitted dilemma will remain anonymous.
3. All "posted" dilemmas will have the names John Doe and Jane Doe according to submitters gender.
4. Dazd Central Admin reserves the right to edit original submission for content and language. Editing will be emailed to submitter in advance of posting.
5. Dazd Central Admin will select each dilemma according to no structured protocol.
6. Dazd Central Admin reserves the right to update these rules as they occur. Rules may change without advance warning.

***Our first Dilemma was a success***

Thursday, March 29, 2007

GW's Stand-up Comedy

George Bush's speech Wednesday night at the annual Radio and Television Correspondents’ Association dinner in Washington. I thought he gave a great speech. His timing was on, he was really funny, and at the end he sounded really heartfelt and sincere. I was impressed.

It's a hoot...maybe he can host a show for Comedy Central.

Real vs. Antagonism

I thank you for the comments concerning this post. I agree that someone shouldn't cower in regards to an "unidentified antagonist". My question is when does the antagonism evolve into a real threat?

Dogs who bark loudly seldom bite.

People should care less about what others think or fantasize about, even though some of them are disturbed enough to /speak out/ their fantasies publically. I feel sorry for them.

Fear of death is deeply rooted in us humans. It is funny how some cultures frown upon even mentioning death, as if not admitting that death exists would erase the fact that it's inevitable. Some nut with a loose tongue says some WORDS and people tremble in fear. Right now, somebody who posted threats is having an orgasm because people with psychological issues are fueled by the reacting emotions of their victim.

Antagonism becomes a threat when it becomes personal. Personal on the level on detailing one's life patterns, employment, family, etc... When the antagonist can detail these things in writing or verbally, it becomes real. Each of us will respond in ways we consider appropriate, although others will disagree. That's when the government and law officials should intervene.

And after reviewing the site linked on the original post, a few commentors regarded this as a gender attack. Well maybe so but a threat is a threat. And it's documented that any gender can pose a threat. We should all remember the blogosphere's reaction to threats made against Jeff Goldstein's child. And of course the ever continuing saga of sue/counter sue. I spent a few minutes and found these links. I did find a few links with updates to this saga but unfortunately they have been removed.

Site #1

Site #2

Site #3

Threats do exist in real life and in the virtual world of cyber. We must all develop thick skin to endure these hardships. My only question is when does the government take seriously the victims rights? If someone hacks a website today, are they prosecuted the same as someone who firebombs your house? Or a media building?

As I once told an antagonist, "You can beat the crap out of me today, but you had better be ready tomorrow. I'll be back tomorrow and the next day and the day after that...until I get it right. So unless you want to see me daily, I'd suggest you back the fluck off!" It worked.

Any thoughts?

Wednesday, March 28, 2007


Folks...once again I'm adding people to my blogroll. I's growing leaps and bounds but I find it difficult to keep the good reading to myself.

Peri Wrinkles is such an addition. Make sure to stop by and tell her Dazd sent you.

Then there's Chickie...who I found by accident reading comments. Some good reading and very interesting rants. Make sure to stop by and tell her Dazd sent you.

Next up is Kurt of A Trainwreck in Maxwell. Always good for a laugh or deep thinking. Make sure to stop by and tell him Dazd sent you.

Oh there's more to add but I think I'm gonna wait....keeps the suspense going you know. Enjoy these sites folks...I sure have!

Tuesday, March 27, 2007


Folks, in my enthusiastic search for blogging material, I've stumbled across something horrific.

Be forewarned, the following link contains offensive images and language.

Do not read this if you're paranoid. Seriously...

If you were adventurous enough to read this article, I'd like to hear your comments.

Offbeat Tuesday

I have seen Wordless Wednesday posts. I decided we needed an offbeat day. So Tuesdays will be a teaching of the English language and some obscure terminology and unknown facts.

"Facetious" and "abstemious" are the only words that contain all the vowels in the correct order.

"Adcomsubordcomphibspac" is the longest acronym. It is a Navy term standing for Administrative Command, Amphibious Forces, Pacific Fleet Subordinate Command.

"Almost" is the longest commonly used word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

"Fickleheaded" and "fiddledeedee" are the longest words consisting only of letters in the first half of the alphabet.

"Asthma" and "isthmi" are the only six-letter words that begin and end with a vowel and have no other vowels between.

And to add some intellectual thought, how many words can be generated from the word "Therein" using consecutive letters? Example: rein

Friday Word Scramble Answers

1. oaoiifacfnd is afficionado.
2. onsitripnai is inspiration.
3. gotsliohor is horologist.
4. rbmoxgeureul is luxembourger.
5. vaiacldrsaourc is cardiovascular.

Original post here.

And Chickie was right...alcohol does NOT help matters when trying to figure these out.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Caption it!

Caption the picture above in the comments. Winner will be announced Friday.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Friday Night Serenade

Friday evening folks and I'm flipping through my songs. Oh such a collection for almost any mood. Yet I still have troubles tonight finding that perfect mix. I listened to some blues and jazz earlier, Hard Rock/Metal, Pop Rock, Country/Bluegrass, classical...nothing seemed to soothe my soul. I've struggled all week and Friday's are nights to relax. Sitting here with a crown and coke watching the world scroll by ever so gently. Relinquishing all my senses to my surroundings, thinking of days gone by and yearning to immerse myself deep within my memories. Memories of good and the bad, the mediocre and of missing relatives and friends. Wondering if and when all these memories will fade. Missing friends of old while cherishing friends of new. They all have similarities and differences but they all share one common point. They have been apart of my life and now apart of my memories.

I have found my mood and although it seems to be a depressing one on paper, its actually quite theraputic as I recall those memories. I sometimes get so wrapped in the present I fail to remember the past. Is the past not what made us who we are? Of course during that past moment, the present, we have a vague understanding of how we will develop based upon our past. And when we finally realize that its our past that molded us, we look to the future. The future of who we are, who our children will be and how we will survive all the trials and tribulations of life. And we try oh so hard to relive our past through our children we sometimes lose focus of the importance surrounding our teachings. How will our child when they become an adult reflect back on their past? Will they have the same fond memories and spend an evening sipping a crown and coke debating the importance of all that surrounds us? Or will they simply follow blindly along never understanding how their destiny has already been molded.

Music I have found to soothe my soul....below the fold, my dear readers.

And after listening to the exquisite sounds of the Eagles, I shall slip into some Kansas and then into the depths of Pink Floyd. For this night I shall be soothed by such masterful harmonics and euphonic sounds that feeling comfortably numb may not portray the feeling adequately.

Friday Word Scramble

1. oaoiifacfnd
2. onsitripnai
3. gotsliohor
4. rbmoxgeureul
5. vaiacldrsaourc

Answers your results in the comments!

News Flash

WDZD has a Breaking News Story!

If you've been following the Adventures of Straight White Guylately, its no surprise that Eric claims to have a Bovine Fan Club. Eric reportedly was adored by a herd of cows.

This reporter has obtained special footage of Eric's encounter the day after his Bovine lunch break. That's right folks, he went back looking to reclaim his honor. We are shocked at the ruthlessness to which Eric seeks vengance. He cleverly disguises himself so he won't be recognized by the herd. However, one cow isn't so easily foooooled. careful viewing the moooooovie below the fold. It's definitely not for those with 4 weak stomachs. At one point it's a teatillating experience to behold.

Thursday, March 22, 2007


Nothing of any substance to post lately. I had an easy time last week and this week I'm struggling. Too bad work gets in the way when I hit those streaks.

I've been updating my resume and I think its complete. Not that I've found any jobs worth applying, but one never can tell when the right one comes along. And to be honest, lately I've been bored at work.

So I invested time and looked up some fun jobs:

Rodeo Clown
Seriously..where else can you dress up goofy and get paid for it? Sure sure..there's the element of danger. All you need is hamburger buns with ketchup and they are docile. And you help save a life!

Test Driver Safer then a race car driver. And if you break something they have to fix it. Test drive all the newest models and review which ones are best.

Snow Plow Driver Oh the first street cleared during a snowstorm!

Zamboni Operator Open a side business selling flavored ice cones. You make money because you get the ice for free!

Archaeologist Now this I've always wanted to try. I think it would be fun.

Pyrotechnician Blow things up...need I say more?

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Another Weird One

GuyK has been struggling with keeping the treerats out of his bird feeders. cmk is dealing with chipmunks invading her home. An APB has been put out for Chip and Dale. This little contraption may work for cmk as well.

Watch the movie below the fold for an ingenious idea to thwart their efforts.

Weird Wednesday

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Gorilla who?
Gorilla me a cheese sandwich please.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ben who?
Ben knocking so long my hand hurts.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wooden who?
Wooden you like to know.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Broken Pencil
Broken Pencil who?
It's a pointless joke!

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Isaac who?
Isaac of knock knock jokes!

Tongue Twister...
Once upon a barren moor
There dwelt a bear, also a boar.
The bear could not bear the boar.
The boar thought the bear a bore.
At last the bear could bear no more
Of that boar that bored him on the moor,
And so one morn he bored the boar--
That boar will bore the bear no more.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

This Moment

Touch the sky with the color so blue
Lay amongst the clouds so high
I dream of things I can’t do
If only, I give a sigh

Sun warms my solemn face
Warmth permeates my soul
Comforting as a gentle embrace
Depleting all effects of the cold

Wind calmly brushes my face
Gently assuring the illusion is true
Certainty this is the place
Rouses feelings I once knew

Sunlight glistens from atop the snow so white
For a moment I close my eyes
Today will be today however trite
If only, I give a sigh

Copyright © 2000 Dazdnconfzd

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Sunday Game

Channel surfing on Sunday morning...nothing like it folks. Lazy day here at Dazd Central. I have no plans today and if I get motivated, I'm sure I'll still have no plans.

I did come across an interesting show today. I didn't stay around past the second story. It really depressed me and I felt envy with hatred, this isn't a good thing for a Sunday. The show depicted peoples lives that had won a lottery. And this wasn't some fly-by-night coverage, oh no sir. It was coverage up to and after the winnings. Yes, the two I watched seemed level-headed enough not to be bankrupt within 5 years. And also seemed deserving of making easy street for the rest of their lives.

What the hell about me!?!?!

Anyways, I started thinking how I'd spend my money. Then my thought quickly changed to how I can make money now. And I've come up with this brilliant idea. Oh yes...brilliant! I'm going to visit those fine folks that won the lottery. There's gonna be a little game we can play...

Friday, March 16, 2007

St. Patrick's Day Wishes

May the lilt of lush laughter lighten ever road,
May the midst of Irish magic shorten every road.
May you taste the sweetest pleasures
that fortune ever bestowed,
And may all your friends remember
all the favors you are owed.

May you always have
Walls for the winds,
A roof for the rain,
Tea beside the fire,
Laughter to cheer you,
Those you love near you,
And all your heart might desire!

Go mbeannai Dia duit!

Irish Fun

Ok...I found some interesting Irish pictures. (SFW)

For the ladies:

For the men:

Well this one has a health advisory (even though she has nothing to do with Irish)...Make sure to eat your veggies:

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Quiz Time

You scored as Mysterious. You wish to hide who you are from all those around you. You find it very hard to trust people. You also may enjoy the fun that comes from playing mind games with others around you.My advice Get out there and reveal the true you if only to one person!



Eyes full of Pain


Diamond Eyes




What do your eyes reveal about you?(PICS!)
created with

H/T to Letters From NYC

Ramblings of the Bewildered

If you want to wish someone congrats on 10,000 hits, you might wanna go give Freddie some cheers. Not only is there a cute frog in her header pic, there's some good reading there too. And the 10,000 person is a complete mystery...

Anyone switched to Windows Vista yet? hmmmm? (crickets chirping)
I haven't but they just bought a new computer here at work and it's got Vista. Oh yea...the volunteered IT guy? Ummm, that would be me sir. ugh Any site references or knowledge would be greatly appreciated. (This content is unsecure. Allow or Disallow?) lol

Lets military link for me. I may appear Dazd and Confzd but I eventually catch onto these sorta things. Operation Iraqi Freedom

Wow..3 posts in one day? shhhh Those first two took me the last two weeks to put together. Pretty weak huh?

Wanna read something that chaps my...go read here about MSM spinning things.

Demon cat is being evicted. He started marking inside the house this week. So he'll either find a good home or be an outside cat permanently. That is after he gets his you-know-whats snipped. (Which had been scheduled for the last week to happen next week) So him getting snipped will stop the marking? Yes? No? Maybe?

Sinus infection is starting to get better. Still have a headache but feeling better overall.

St. Patrick's Day Recipes

Irish Freckle Bread

This delicious, traditional soda bread recipe -- freckled with currants, raisins or cranberries -- is irresistible served warm with butter. It’s ridiculously easy to make, even if you’ve never made bread before.


3-3/4 cups (850 mL) all purpose flour
1/4 cup (50 mL) brown sugar
1 tbsp. (15 mL) baking powder
1 tsp. (5 mL) baking soda
1/2 tsp. (2 mL) salt
3/4 cup (175 mL) dried currants, raisins or dried cranberries
2 cups (500 mL) buttermilk
1 egg
Cooking Instructions

1. Preheat the oven to 375° F (190° C). Grease a cookie sheet or line with parchment paper.

2. In a large bowl, mix together the flour, brown sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Add the dried currants and mix well.

3. In another bowl, stir together the buttermilk and the egg. Pour the buttermilk mixture into the flour mixture, and stir well until everything is blended. The dough will be quite soft. Sprinkle some additional flour onto the counter or table and turn the dough out onto this floured surface. Knead the dough about 10 times - just to make it reasonably smooth and pliable. Gently form it into one large, round loaf and place it onto the prepared baking sheet. With a very sharp knife, cut a shallow X into the top of the loaf. (This allows the bread to expand in the oven rather than crack and split.)

4. Bake for 50 to 55 minutes, or until the loaf is nicely browned, and a toothpick poked into the middle of it comes out clean.

Traditional Irish Stew

Lean lamb is layered with potatoes and other veggies and baked to fork-tenderness. A perfect main dish for a St. Patrick’s Day dinner, and a great way to introduce kids to a new meat.


2 lbs. (1 kg.) boneless lamb shoulder, cut into 1 inch (2 cm) cubes
4 medium potatoes, sliced 1/2 inch (1 cm) thick
2 medium onions, sliced 1/4 inch (.5 cm) thick
2 stalks celery, sliced 1/4 inch (.5 cm) thick
4 medium carrots, peeled and sliced 1/4 inch (.5 cm) thick
1 tsp. (5 mL) salt
1/2 tsp. (2 mL) thyme
1/4 tsp. (1 mL) black pepper
1 cup (250 mL) water
2 tbsp. (30 mL) chopped fresh parsley
Cooking Instructions

1. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F (160 degrees C).

2. In a large Dutch oven or covered casserole, layer the ingredients in the following order: lamb cubes, sliced potatoes, sliced onions, sliced celery, sliced carrots, sprinkling each layer with salt, pepper and thyme.

3. Add the water to the pot, cover, and slowly bring to a boil over medium-low heat.

4. Let simmer for 5 minutes, then transfer the pot to the oven and bake, without lifting the lid or stirring, for 2 to 2-1/2 hours or until the lamb is tender.

5. Sprinkle with chopped parsley, stir very gently to mix (the potatoes will be very soft) and serve.

Irish Coffee Brownies

1 1/4 cups granulated sugar
3/4 cup butter or margarine, softened
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 cup milk
1/4 cup Irish whiskey
2 tablespoons instant coffee crystals
1 cup chopped walnuts
2 1/2 cups sifted powdered sugar
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tablespoon Irish whiskey
1 1/4 teaspoons vanilla
3-4 tablespoons brewed coffee
chopped walnuts (optional)

-Heat granulated sugar, butter or margarine, and 1/2 cup cocoa powder in a large saucepan over medium heat until butter or margarine melts, stirring constantly.
Remove from heat.
-Add eggs and 1 teaspoon vanilla; beat lightly just until combined.
-Stir together flour, baking powder, and baking soda in a bowl; set aside.
-Stir together milk and 1/4 cup whiskey; stir in coffee crystals.
-Add flour mixture and milk mixture alternately to the chocolate mixture, beating by hand after each addition.
-Stir in nuts. Pour into a greased 15x10x1-inch baking pan.
-Bake in a 350 degree F oven for 15 to 20 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean.
-Cool in pan on a wire rack.

Meanwhile, for the Irish Coffee Glaze, stir together sifted powdered sugar, 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder, 1 tablespoon Irish whiskey, and 1-1/4 teaspoons vanilla.
Stir in 3 to 4 tablespoons brewed coffee until of drizzling consistency.
If desired, sprinkle with additional chopped nuts. Makes 36 brownies.

Irish Float

4 cups ice
3/4 cup canned sweetened coconut cream (Coco Lopez)
6 tablespoons coffee liqueur
6 tablespoons irish cream
chocolate shavings

Blend first 4 ingredients in blender until smooth.
Pour into 2 tall glasses.
Sprinkle with chocolate and serve.

St. Patrick's Day Humor

Two Irishmen, Patrick & Michael, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freighter. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Patrick stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously To the amazement of Patrick, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter, Patrick blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into Guinness Beer!" The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of Guinness on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances. Michael looked disgustedly at Patrick whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going Patrick! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat!

Q: Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
A: Regular rocks are too heavy.

Q: Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
A: Because they're always a little short.

Q: What's Irish and stays out all night?
A: Patty O'furniture!

An Irishman had been drinking at a pub all night. The bartender finally said that the bar is closing. So the Irishman stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand one more time; same result. He figured he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up.

Once outside he stood up and fell flat on his face. So he decided to crawl the 4 blocks to his home. When he arrived at the door he stood up and again fell flat on his face. He crawled through the door and into his bedroom. When he reached his bed he tried one more time to stand up. This time he managed to pull himself upright, but he quickly fell right into bed and is sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He was awakened the next morning to his wife standing over him, shouting, "So, you've been out drinking again!!"
"What makes you say that?" he asked, putting on an innocent look.
"The pub called. You left your wheelchair there again."

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Irish you a Happy St. patrick's Day!

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Highway to Hell

Driving at night is becoming difficult for me. Yes I realize I'm not old enough to worry about losing my license. However, I am fully aware of the dangers that await every on-coming car while entering a curve. And not to mention those bright street lights that are on every corner.

By 2020 it is projected that one in five drivers will be age 65 and over—and older eyes don't see as well at night. The usual visual clues—pavement markings and warning signs—are harder to see. Its not just elder drivers who need help with night vision. The average person's night vision begins to deteriorate at 40. Half of all fatalities occur at night although traffic volume is lower. According to data in Traffic Safety Facts 2000, published by the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), the fatal crash rate for nighttime driving is three to four times that for daytime driving.

So I guess statistically I'm on the decline. Two things in life we are required to do: Die and pay taxes. My issue is driving in rain mostly. And also glare from on-coming headlights. You know the jerks who don't turn off their high beams. Or have that 4WD truck with lifter kits. here's a tip that I was taught and use quite frequently:

Focus on the white "fog line" along the right side of the road. Keep track of the high-beam birdbrain with your peripheral vision. If you allow the bright lights to ruin your night vision, it will take between four and seven seconds for it to recover. By keeping your eyes averted to the right, you'll limit the damage to your night vision.

So the newspaper article? Well let me tell you a story...

I'm driving home from seeing some friends around 10 pm one night. I normally take the side streets but decided tonight I'd take the highway. I might get home in time to see reruns of Seinfeld. Any ways, as I was approaching the highway ramps, it began to rain. Not a downpour but enough that I actually had to use those windshield wipers. I knew I forgot to replace something lat the windshield is all mucked up. As I got closer I saw the light was green and sped up enough to beat the light. Yes! Oh stop you're honking...I made it and you didn't, too bad so sad. Loser...

As I made my way onto the highway I noticed I was heading west instead of east. I tell you, it's bad enough these highway workers stand around all day. It's another for them to put signs up in the wrong place. I'll have to find the next exit and turn around. That exit proved to be difficult to find in the rain and they must be replacing them because I didn't see one gotdamn sign!

And drvers and their etiquette these days, nobody gives a damn. It's like I had a sign on my car...Hey look at me! I have Night Vision Driving Issues! Damn near every driver on that highway was flashing their brights at me. So naturally I imposed the defensive tactics of watching the fog line. And I'll be damned if people weren't passing me on the right too! In a damn hurry I might add...

And another thing that was annoying...people would wait until the got right next to me and honk their horn! Talk about a big was almost as bad as the headlights. I finally found one of those unmarked exits and made a fast exit. Only to find a cop was giving me an escort. He musta read that sign all those other drivers were seeing. That was nice of because everyone was pulling over for me. Boy that sure did cut down on my travel time, let me tell you.

And when I looked again there were more cops behind me. Those boys in uniform sure know how to block off traffic too! They were blocking all the side streets and not allowing anyone in front of me. Well heck, now I had time to stop at the Quik Mart. I was getting mighty thirsty after all those idiot drivers. So since everyone was getting out of my way and those cops were escorting me, I decided I should just speed along. Heck, why not? So I upped the speed to 50 in a 35 mph zone. I was moving along at a great pace while Sammy Hagar was blaring "I can't drive 55". Well damnit Sammy you need your own escort like me dude!

Well if my luck could've gotten any better it sure went sour real fast. I got a flat tire...thats right a flat tire. nad you know that cop sure was trying his best to get that obstacle outta my path. I tell you...those boys don't get paid enough in my opinion. Well as fate would have it, the Qwik Mart was just at the next corner. So I turned in there and parked right next to the front door. And you know what? Those boys must not of had anything else better to do that night. Cos they all got out with their guns drawn. Damn for a minute I thought maybe someone was robbing the Qwik Mart. Pretty stupid of you ask me with all those cops out there and all.

I was ready to get outta the car when an officer approached me and yelled "Get Down!"...and there musta been a bee or something becaused he let lose a spray of insect killer. But damn he really should get retrained on that cos his aim is wayyyyyyy off. Got me right in the eyes! Well his buddies musta felt like I was gonna get up and open a can of whoop ass on this fella. I can get pretty mean ya know when I have too. So to protect him, they put a nice set of what they call 'cuffs' on me. Kinda tight but I'm sure that fella is counting his lucky stars tonight I left my can of whoop ass at home.

And then to top that off...oh it gets better folks...they promised me a night in a hotel with showers, food, bed and company. Man I tell you what, they must think I was the King of Spain or something. I asked them if they'd kindly get those damn signs fixed on the highway. every exit I passed was missing one. They told me they would as soon as Hell froze over...I guess they were gonna watch the weather forecast for Hell, Michigan that night. They even said I'd have a roommate that was gonna be so happy to see me. Yea...his name is Bubba. They promised he'd take real good care of me and all. I wouldn't feel lonely at all that night.

I wonder if Bubba is some kind of royalty too...

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Monday's Round-up Follow-up

Sinus infection! Full blown too...has moved into my ears and I am miserable. Doc said if I'd had waited until late this week they'd have to Roto-Rooter. Antibiotics for everyone! For the sinus infection...nothing else! Geez people...

Mrs. JoseGoldbloom has returned! Hibernation effects people differently. heh And make sure to check out Dragon's Zombie kinda glad I live here and not there. I'm thinking those neighbors must be either too drunk to notice or awfully understanding. Or all their guns were being cleaned...still a good movie!

Thank you for all the well wishes. Eric...I'm sure this past weekend's RattleSnake/Blogger Meet would've provided all the bacteria killer I could've handled. Wonder how it would work as anti-venom...

Ok, that about does it for today. I was doing something and forgot so I'll just stop everything.

Oh yes...I was working!

I know its not good etiquette to update posts, so sue me.
Go read this great masterpiece while I go change my britches. I have not laughed like that in a very long time. The suspense alone was like waiting outside the bathroom after hearing, "I'm almost done, just a second."

Monday, March 12, 2007

Monday Round-up

Sucks being sick on a Sunday. My cold has morphed into a full-blown sinus infection. Complete with hearing loss in one ear and thumping my head sounds like a ripe melon. I spent most of yesterday in bed sleeping and watching boring TV. My equilibriam(sp) was off yesterday so it was fun trying to walk. Getting around objects in my path proved I have some Fred Astaire in me.

I've added a few new people to my blogroll. Mohawk Chieftain, Boobies & Beer and American Ranger are all great blog reads. Go check them out...

Blogging may be light while I regenerate. Off to call the doctor...

Friday, March 09, 2007

Weekly Life Experiences

My post from last Saturday generalized a diverse topic. Paranormal, or rather in this case anomalous phenomenon, is defined as follows:

An anomalous phenomenon is an observed phenomenon for which there seems to be no agreeable scientific explanation. Because such observations do not fit into the established framework or consensus reality, they can be the subject of controversy.

These phenomena are not generally accepted as real by mainstream scientists. Ideas about hard-to-reproduce anomalies are considered pseudoscientific, partly because science needs phenomena to be reproducible.

Other phenomena are recognized to be real, but cannot be readily explained. For example, many people have observed unidentified flying objects; but their explanations for such objects differ.

Examples of anomalous phenomena

alien abduction experiences
deja vu
extrasensory perception
folie a deux
near-death experiences
out-of-body experiences
paranormal vanishing
reality shifts
Spontaneous Human Combustion
twin pain

Some anomalies eventually get a scientific explanation, losing their status as unexplained phenomena. For example, while the idea of stones falling from the sky was once considered anomalous, meteorites are now acknowledged and well understood. Another example of this was the Tunguska event, which spawned a wide variety of both scientific and pseudoscientific explanations, ranging from asteroids to cross-dimensional rips, prior to the emergence of a strong scientific consensus that the event was the result of the explosive disruption of an asteroid, or possibly a comet, in the atmosphere.

Now I won't claim to have all of the above. I realize there's more that can be added or sub-topics but this gives you a general idea of the diversity of paranormal experiences". However I do experience 2 of these listed. Deja vu and Ghosts are close descriptions of the experiences I've encountered. Now before we go any further reading, I'm not taking Ghost Busters type stuff here folks. Although I'll add that Sigourney Weaver wasd steamy in that movie. And at the time of the movie release, I thought Rick Moranis was one lucky son-of-a....well, back to my story.

My encounters with the above listed 2 subjects have been sporadic at best. The deja vu ones are hard to pinpoint. They sneek up on you and literally pass before you realize it's happening. One that is very vivid from my childhood happened when I was 10 maybe 11 years old. We were spending time at Grandma Ruby's during a snowstorm. The furnace had smoked itself and we slept at her house for a week. At the time, she had a young man from church, who was finishing out his senior year, staying with her. I remember dreaming one night of waking to bacon, eggs and oatmeal for breakfast. Along with that was Grandma and David having a discussion about U.S. History. It was a deep conversation, almost a heated debate. A couple of mornings later, the event unfolded. I awoke to the food with David and Grandma conducting their debate. It all unfolded as if a movie script was being rehearsed. I don't recall exact details now some 31 years later. But the event is forever part of memories that I cherish and respect.

Grandma and David were debating and neither side was giving ground. Grandma Ruby was always right unless you proved her wrong. I gained that trait that sometimes gets me into trouble. Anyways, when at a certain point of the conversation I blurted out the answer to his theory and expanded as best a 10 year old could. Yes, not only was I amazed, but everyone else had Kodak moment faces. To my astonishment, I was informed the following week I was correct. And the graded paper proved it. Now you're probably thinking, damn smart kid. But what set this apart for a mere coincidence was the fact the players, conversation, food, seating assignments and conversation were exact to the last detail.

There have been many many others that have played out during the 31 years since that morning. Some are fleeting moments while others are lengthy with only bits and pieces tying the whole deja vu experience together.


And for ghostly encounters, I'll save that for another post. In the meantime, go check out cmk. cmk has an interesting tale of paranormal encounters.

Friday Testimonial

Folks...another work week has come to a close. TGIF! I sit here writing this entry sipping a Crown Royal and Pepsi, listening to tunes with the headphones and enjoying a peaceful night here at Dazd Central. The tunes are mood inspiring, heart racing, depressing and overall damn good tunes, if I say so myself. I have Muddy Waters, Doobie Brothers, Foghat, Metallica, Aerosmith, Merle Haggard and the list goes on. All set on shuffle so I have no idea what's next. Sometimes when I write thats how I gain inspiration. Joe Walsh sums it up perfectly right now...Life's been good to me so far.

I had an interesting quote today. I think it rounded me out nicely. You know the missus tells me "You're not right in the head" most of the time. Other times she sits in complete awe of the spewage I send forth. Some days she just shakes her head, laughs and moves on...knowing my sarcasm is unchallengable. I've also been told I'm disturbed and know things most normal people don't. This quote, actually two of them, are worthy of noting. I won't say who quoted these...but I take great pride and accept them with honor.

A Badge of Honor, if you will:

"He has a whole different view of the world. (Like looking at bugs through a broken coke bottle.)"
"Dazed and Confuzed looks at life differently than most of us. Bizarre, yet hauntingly true. Always a good read!"

Folks...if there ever was a time to hit the pinnacle of achievement, I do believe I've reached it. I've made my mark on the blogosphere, even if ever so briefly. I will bask in the humbleness (cough) and my fifteen minutes of fame should be up about now.

Now Ole Ted is telling me there's a stranglehold going on. I do believe I'll expand on my post from last Saturday. And if the tunes hold out, my fingers don't cramp and the whisky stays chilled, I might just keep posting into the wee hours of the morning. I would say until the cows come home but there's a certain person who is opening Montana Mooooooosings soon. Stay Tuned!

Incoherent Thoughts

Is anyone else's sitemeter flucked up? Mines been stuck now for a few days.

I read an article yesterday concerning rising gas prices. Here's what struck my as ummmm funny: "Gasoline prices have topped $3 a gallon in parts of California and Hawaii, and may hit that level elsewhere in the country as the busy summer driving season approaches."'s March 9th for Pete's sake! Did the date of summer change along with March 11th Daylight Savings Time move? How did Congress pass this?

Since I'm not able to take care of my yard like years past, I'm seriously considering cementing my whole yard and painting it green. The dog and cat won't be happy about it but I'm not here to serve their wants and needs. Think I'm nuts? Check this out...

I love being a Hoosier...I'm damn proud of the fact. Seriously...go read this article here. It's Lassie for Pete's sake! I didn't know Lassie was a Hoosier...

But then I'm brought back to reality after reading this bullsh*t here.

Anyone have plans for this weekend?

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Weekly Dilemma Reminder

Here's what's been brewing at Dazd Central. I decided that you, the reader and blog author, may have issues that you'd like input from the blogosphere. But feeling timid about posting to your own site? Afraid that people will snicker and ridicule you? Afraid that family will discover your dilemma and domestic issues will commence? Read more by clicking the Rambling On... button.

Worry no more...Dazd has conceived a plan to overcome your fears. I am willing to post weekly (day undecided as of yet) your dilemma for the blogosphere to comment. We all know that among the 10 comments there's a chance 1 of those is the golden nugget.

What's required from you? Nothing more than an email to me. Whats required of me? Simply picking one and posting it. Simple? Well, yes but wait! There's more...anonymity for you! That's right...anonymity!

What kind of dilemmas am I allowed to submit Dazd? Good question there John Doe. You can submit almost any content. However, I reserve the final decision. I'd ask that the submissions be of a "personal" nature and not something "world wide". There are plenty of sites dedicated to politics, war, racism, etc...

So Mrs. John Doe is cheating on you and you're not sure how to approach that she's been caught? Caught 6 year old Johnny streaking through the neighbors back yard and not sure how to handle it? That person at the sub shop always scratches their nose before making your sandwich...who do you complain to?

Send me an email and let's see what the blogosphere has to say. C' can do it!

Dilemma Submitting Guidelines:
1. Submit via my email address with your valid email account. If your dilemma is chosen, I will reply to that email account. No response within 72 hours will result in deletion of email.
2. All email addresses and origin of submitted dilemma will remain anonymous.
3. All "posted" dilemmas will have the names John Doe and Jane Doe according to submitters gender.
4. Dazd Central Admin reserves the right to edit original submission for content and language. Editing will be emailed to submitter in advance of posting.
5. Dazd Central Admin will select each dilemma according to no structured protocol.
6. Dazd Central Admin reserves the right to update these rules as they occur. Rules may change without advance warning.

***Our first Dilemma was a success***
Weekly Dilemma #1

Music Galore

If you love music, you have to check this out! You won't be disappointed.

Music Jukebox

H/T to Cindi

Now I have tunes at work!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

A Lost Family Member

It has been a hectic week so far. Yes, I realize its only Tuesday but weeks start off slow or fast, no in-between. While I welcome the change of pace from last Monday, these last 2 days have left a mark.

During our water heater replacement, it became apparent that a family member had left Dazd Compound, errr Central. This family member didn't leave because of work nor out of fear. The member left for reasons and destinations unknown. We contacted the proper authorities who put out an APB. We distributed flyers at the corner stores and local gas stations. We contacted a local search team to assist us if necessary. I had just started to organize a volunteer search effort along with local authorities.

Then the call came...the call we all dreaded yet we knew it might relieve or anxiety. Bringing our horror to a closure. The phone rang for a second time...then a third...everyone was waiting for my reaction. I felt frozen in time as my heart raced faster. I quickly grabbed a nitro pill in case another heart attack set in. I catiously picked up the phone and dryly said, "Hello?"

There was a gruff voice on the other end. "Sir, we've found your family member. He was located approximately 2 miles from your residence", the gruff Officer proclaimed. He continued, "After we woke him from slumber we had to restrain him." Now this didn't surprise me at all...

So when I told the family the glorious news, they were both happy, excited and hesitant at the same time. We had no idea what had happened and quite frankly, I was too scared to ask. When the gruff Officer arrived, "Sir, you owe $16.49 plus $50 for transport fees." I gasped and grudingly paid the gruff Officer. At which time he prompltly handed me an envelope containing pictures....

And here is the Demon Cat. I'll have to hide the whiskey and the missus will have to hide her smokes. I see rehab in his future...

I was charged for this Cat Carrier...

All in all we are glad to have the cat back. I hoped he found Jesus while he was on the streets. He's gonna need all the help he can when he sobers up!

New Site

Folks...go over and check out the new Indiana Patriot Guard blog. I'll be contributing there as well as DNR.

Posting is light today as I am buried in paperwork. (actually having to work at work sucks ya know) And I used all my pre-written posts already.

Lunch is over....don't whip me again boss! nooooooooooooo...

Monday, March 05, 2007

Monday Morning

What a sunshiny morning here at Dazd Central. Weather is cold but the sun is out!
Weekend was adventurous as the missus and I went to dinner Saturday. It was a nice dinner altho we didn't dine at our pre-planned destination. Those pesky 2 hour waits are killers. I know, I know, reservations! Who needs reservations when you can spend 45 minutes driving in snow flurries while enjoying the scenery?

Sunday wasn't as exciting. We woke to a soggy hallway carpet which meant only one thing. New water heater! And being one of those under cabinet types, I had to disassemble the kitchen sink and counter top. 4 hours later the repair work was finished and all the tools put back. How much did it cost? Well, I didn't ask and sent the missus with her Uncle. I figured if I knew and had problems, I'd be cussing about paying $XXX.XX amount for a BEEP BEEP piece of BEEP BEEP that worked like a BEEP BEEP.

Anyways...some changes here at Dazd Central. I'm adding tags and looks like I'll need to massage the coding a little. But I'll do that later...

I hope everyone had a great weekend!

Saturday, March 03, 2007

The List

There are events taking place that we cannot really understand. As children we are programmed to accept certain events or instances as idiotic or misguided. We talk privatley about them to ourselves or to a trusted individual. But we never cover the subjects within a group for fear of persecution. It's how we've been programmed from our earliest childhood development stages. And history is full of these scenarios playing out again and again, different players and scenarios but the reaction is the same.

I have this ability that I believe runs through my family from past generations. From my earliest childhood I recall events taking place and not understanding them, I asked questions of the adults surrounding me. Only one person, possibly two, truly understood what my questions were. And it wasn't until my late teens that the discussions took place without really saying it. There have been many events in my life that have left me dazzled if not puzzled. And simply, whether you believe in these abilities or not, they do occur within my realm of existence.

I have premonition dreams. They are capable of a very detailed nature and play out at a later unspecified time, exactly to detail. There are capable of message bearing types not necessarily detailed but the event does take place. The players in the premonition may not be exact but its all relevant.

Can I predict the future? No..there is no timestamp, relevance to dates or time frames. Just that it will happen. I don't even know what dreams will happen and which ones won't until the event occurs. It's all very puzzling and sometimes I've thought my sanity was teetering. But it's real and I have learned to accept it.

Why am I explaining this to the blogosphere? I cannot explain why but merely I feel compelled to deliver my message, even if through some anonymity. And to also give you, my dear readers, another insight into my dealings with death. I must confess I didn't see "the light" or any visions of my maker. I don't believe I ever passed out and I never saw any burn marks where defibrilation was given. But rather I dealt with death in a much calmer tone. As sense of reality and common sense interwoven like a fine blanket. Yes I have thanked my maker many times over. I have changed my life, not only physically and mentally but spiritually as well. And by spiritually, I'm not suggesting I've become a religious person overnight. That day is coming. I do believe in my maker and hold him the highest regard.

Spiritually I am referring to believing those events that surround me as factual. I am also accepting the fact of my previous events as true and accepting them as well. I am not denying them anymore nor am I going to persue them to extend its relevance. I am accepting them for what they are and what they tell me.

There is a list I have scribed. The list is tucked away someplace safe. I will know when I should review this list to inventory the players. And if all the players are present, I know my destiny. You see, this list was generated one week before my heart attack. This list was generated out of unexplained compulsion. The list played out in my dream. The players were real and they all spoke of past discussions I'd had with each one regarding death. The players have all deceased and all are with their maker. Yet the reason I was calm and sensible about what was taking place revolved around the fact that one person was missing from my dream. When the event was happening, I realized my dream was unfolding. The puzzling dream suddenly set reality into motion. And since that person is not on my list or in my dreams, that person will remain my guardian and teller of truth in my dreams. The person I spoke of death very early in life.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Friday Night Dancing

Dim the lights, turn up the speakers, grab a partner and lets go!

And if these last two slow songs don't produce hot passion....

Make sure to tip your servers well. They work hard so you can enjoy yourselves.
Last one out turn off the lights and lock the door. I'm outta here...

Friday Rant

Ok...I had this nice post written and tried posting it. Guess what? This new Google login is flucked up. God forbid you have more then one gmail/google account and login on another tab while in Blogger. Why? Because when you go to post, it only recognizes your LAST login. And what happens when you click back to try and copy your work? It's flucking gone!!!!!!!!!!

Google...nice idea but fix the gotdamn bugs on this crap. It's irritating...go to login a gmail account and UT OH, it opens the one assigned to Blogger since I opened Blogger last. So that means ANYONE at home or work can access my EMAIL without a flucking password!!!

In other blood pressure is up. lol

Check back later for a Friday Night Boogie post! You music lovers get your dancing shoes. That is unless it gets LOST LIKE THE LAST ONE!!!!!!!!!!!

**kicks the trash can while leaving the room.....

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Healing Songs

Since I'm still sick, here's some tunes associated with being sick...sorta...maybe

And finally, I'm asking the boss as I'm coughing and snot running down my nose...

Thursday Blog Meet

Go over and visit Michele and see what kind of dessert you really are.

Make sure you visit Ambulance Driver today. As he stated in the last comment: "Not that I have anything useful to say - I'm just narcissistic and like the extra hits." Seriously...go check out his latest story.

Then hop on over and visit KeesKeenis as he has some exciting news about his site. Congrats Kees!

Next up is a new read for me. I believe I found him via GuyK. Now if you're an hunting enthusiast you might want to go visit and bookmark this site.