Ramblings of the Dazed and Confuzed one. Some insightful, some meaningless and some just downright stupid. Fact or Fiction is for you to decide. "Reality sucks and Life goes on." ~Dazdnconfzd
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Offbeat Tuesday
The oldest business in the United States of America is the cymbal company Zildjian which was founded in Constantinople in 1623.
"Weird" Al Yankovic received a Bachelor's degree in Architecture in 1981. He also served as valedictorian of his high school at age 16.
The lightning that we see actually goes from the ground to the sky in what is known as the "return stroke" at 1/3 the speed of light. We can't see the initial "stepped leader" that passes from the sky to the ground.
The most common invention of the 19th century was the washing machine. Between 1804 and 1873, at least 1676 patents were issued by the United States Patent Office for various forms of this device.
The five most stolen items in a drugstore are batteries, cosmetics, film, sunglasses, and, get this, Preparation H. Apparently people are just too embarrassed to purchase the last item.
In four separate instances between October 1987 and February 1988, small pink frogs rained down from the sky on to various parts of Great Britain. Scientists are still uncertain as to where these frogs originated, although some have traced them back to the Sahara desert.
Did you ever wonder what the WD in WD-40 stands for? The name was lifted right out chemist Norm Larsen's laboratory notebook. Way back in 1953, he was trying to concoct an anti-corrosion formula, which worked on the basic principle of displacing water. On his 40th try, Larsen finally got it right. Hence the name WD-40. It literally means Water Displacer, 40th try.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Caption It!
First Place: In a sad, but yet happy way, Harry thought it might have been good that he was running late for the family reunion. RalphDood
Second Place: "Yeah, I know it's a meat market. But I just can't resist ogling those breasts and thighs." Sarcasticynic
Third Place: Peter stopped by to gloat in front of what he referred to as the slow learners... Rinsem
Honorable Mention: "Ah...um...Berniece, is that you?" (Obscure Sesame Street reference. Berniece was the name of Bert's pet pigeon.) cmk
This week's caption contest...
Yes...I forgot again this Friday. I apologize and will try harder this week to post the results Friday night.
As always...leave your captions in the comment section!
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Of Memories and Nature
It wasn't until later in life, around 18 years of age, that I began practicing with my compund bow for something other than competition. Well, I can say competition but honestly, I looked at my entries as filler of bodies. See...I could hit a bullseye at 50 yards no problem...unless it was competition. I once hit 3 out of 4 Moosehead Lager beer caps at 50 yards. But the minute we placed a bet on who bought the next 6 pack, I would sometimes just leave then and there for the liquor store. Anyways, I struggled every year from my mistakes and the genius deer. I read magazine after magazine and practiced all year with my bow. I even purchased a single-shot 20 gauge shotgun for squirrel hunting and deer hunting. I never deer hunted much during shotgun season, just never had an opportunity as archery season in Indiana offered more opportunities.
I think it was my 6 or 7th year of deer hunting that all my education and practice seemed to pay off, sort of. We had 1,500 acres to hunt during archery season. Prime deer habitat and farmland along with some of the best backwoods pond fishing I've ever come across. That year I had a stand placement worthy of bagging the huge 6-pointer I'd seen every year for the last 3 years. I had implemented grunt call, rattlin' bag and scents into my arsenal. During the first days hunt, I spotted my elusive buck wandering some 100 yards off through the thick brush. I hadn't used any scents as it was early October, well before the rut here in Indiana. Numerous does had passed with bow range and a few smaller bucks. But this stand location was set for the 6 pointer.
That night as I was leaving, I set a scrape within 30 yards of the stand and laid a trail in a circular irregular pattern throughout the area. I would not hunt the stand the following morning electing to scout and move deer for my fellow hunters. As I passed through my stand area, the area was littered with rubs and a few scrapes. I decided this was my 6-pointer telling me he was boss. I decided that afternoon to return to my stand as a front was moving in and the wind had bedded down the deer. Before climbing into my stand, I reworked the scrape I'd placed the night before. An hour before sunset, I used the grunt call and rattlin' bag. About 15 minutes later I heard noises in the thick brush. I caught a glimpse of the 6-pointer...he'd come back to defend his territory. I had lured him into my area and slowly moved into a position to draw my bow. He moved slowly and cautiously as he sensed something was amiss. It was getting dark quickly and I needed him a few more yards to be within range. I had the rattlin' bag hanging at my waist and decided to rub it against the tree. It worked! He bolted right into the area and stopped behind a tree not affording me a clean shot. It was almost too dark to see when he stepped from behind the tree and I let the arrow fly. A direct hit! He scampered off into the field and I was confident I'd bagged my first deer.
As my buddies scoured the area looking for my arrow or any signs of a hit, they started to quiz me on how confident I felt. I was confident, a good shot with the "thump" of a good hit. We looked for 30 minutes and nothing...not a drop of sign of my arrow. Only then did they notice a reflection some 10 feet off the ground in a small tree. That "thump" I heard was my arrow hitting the tree. I had bagged my first oak tree!
As I walked defeated back to our lodging alone, a figure came into view and rode beside me upon a great beast. He had seen the whole episode play out as if from the magical clouds above. He gave great advice and listened intently as I vented my frustrations. He didn't scold or berate me for my innocent mistake. He talked calmly and assured me I wasn't the first. I felt relaxed and calm after discussing the weekends event with him. However, we hadn't been properly introduced during our 15 minutes of conversation. I kindly asked his name and he replied, "From our ancestors come our names, but from our virtues come our honors." And his mighty beast let out a grunt and he sped off into the darkened horizon. But not before I took this picture...
His site can be found here...
Friday, July 27, 2007
Friday Fun
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Thursday Take-out
1973 Buick Riviera
1975 Chevy Impala
1963 Olds Cutlass
Name the make, model and year of car. Leave your answers in the comments.
Also...Meleah and I have posted a Harry Potter Trivia over at Melevision: TV Junkie!
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Take a Moment
Here is a snippet from the website.
Even though Brandon was only doing what he felt he had to do to save lives, he was charged with attempted murder and assault and he's been sentenced to 15 years in prison. The man who attacked this family is still in the community and was never charged. Brandon is only 20 years old and is facing the prospect of losing his entire youth, all because he stepped up to protect the vulnerable.
We believe that justice was not served in this case. Brandon may have saved four lives and yet he is paying the price for another person’s violence. We believe that Florida’s "stand your ground" law protects Brandon’s actions and yet he wasn’t acquitted. We think Brandon has a strong case for an appeal. We want to get Brandon back home where he belongs. Friends of the family are setting up a legal defense fund to allow Brandon to hire an attorney to bring his appeal and we need your help.
Please...anything you can do to assist this young man will be greatly appreciated.
Official website here.
Click to listen to the show here.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Tuesday Thoughts
Parents are counting the days, not weeks, before kids return to school and peace returnss to the homestead. Summer camps are ending, school camps for football and band are gearing up. We have Xmas in July sales, back to school sales and ice cream vendors are raking in the dough. College bound freshmen are furiously trying to get as much time with friends as humanly possible.
And to think, 42 years ago today there was a birth. Seems surreal that I was born among all these summertime activities.
Offbeat Tuesday
Benjamin Franklin was first to suggest daylight saving.
The most abundant metal in the Earths crust is aluminium.
It snowed in the Sahara desert on 18 February 1979.
On average, an iceberg weighs 20 million tons.
The far side of the moon was first photographed by a Russian satellite in 1959.
Captain Cook was the first man to set foot on all continents except Antarctica.
The diameter of the Moon is 2,160 miles.
The pressure at the Earths inner core is 3 million times Earth's atmospheric pressure.
200 million years ago Earth contained 1 land mass called Pangaea
At the deepest point, an iron ball would take more than an hour to sink to the ocean floor. ( 6.8 miles )
The largest wave ever recorded was near the Japanese Island of Ishigaki in 1971. It was recorded at 279 feet high.
Antarctic means ' opposite the Artic '.
The largest iceberg recorded ( in 1956 ) was 200 miles long and 60 miles wide, larger that the country of Belgium.
The surface of the Dead Sea is 1,312 feet below the surface of the Mediterranean Sea, which is only 47 miles away.
The moon orbits the Earth every 27.32 days.
The country of Benin changed its name from Dahomey in 1975.
The Nova Zemlya Glacier in the (former) USSR is over 1,312 feet long.
The coldest temperature ever recorded was -94 deg Fahrenheit, in Siberia.
The second largest US state in the 1950's was California.
The US state Maryland was named after Queen Henrietta Maria.
The only country to register zero births in 1983 was the 'Vatican City'.
The US state of Florida first saw the cultivation of oranges in 1539.
The world's largest National park is 'Wood Buffalo National Park' in Canada.
The world's largest exporter of sugar is Cuba.
There are no rivers in Saudi Arabia.
England's Stonehenge is 1500 years older than Rome's Colosseum.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Caption Contest Winners
First Place: "This meal has the Good Housekeeping seal of approval." Mrs. Who
Second Place: "I've just been dying for some Chinese food..." Chickie
Third Place: "Arrrrggghhh...Riddle Me This-Riddle Me That- I'm about to engage- in a two for one snack!" Callie
Honorable Mention:
"Mom and kids...the other white meat." Teresa
"Finally! Something besides those damned fish!" BobG
Friday, July 20, 2007
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Thursday What-Nots
I received another award today...I'll post about it soon!
Ok...these two made me laugh. Yes one is damn funny...the other one, I've got first class windows seats on the Hell Express.
"Dr. Crusher and Deanna Troi really need to stop knitting."
or
"Number 1...Double Dog dare you to tell Worf he looks gay!"
Thursday Take-out
=====UPDATED=====
Ok...let's try this one smarty bloggers. I need the name and range of the bird pictured above.
We've had smart shoppers and archaeologists here. Lets see if we have any ornithologists aboard.
=====UPDATED=====
Called the gorgeted puffleg, the new species is easily twice as big as the thumb-sized hummingbirds found in the eastern United States, measuring between 3.5 inches and 4 inches (90 and 100 mm) in length, its discoverers said in answer to e-mailed questions.
The name comes from the iridescent emerald green and electric blue patch on the throat — the gorge — on males, and from tufts of white feathers at the top of the legs, a characteristic of so-called puffleg hummers.
Ornithologists Alexander Cortés-Diago and Luis Alfonso Ortega made three sightings of the hummingbird in 2005 during surveys of mountain cloud forest in the Serrania del Pinche in southwest Colombia. After the birds were seen again in 2006, photographs were sent to the Zoological Research Museum A. Koenig in Germany for confirmation.
Check it out here!
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Awards
I've been selected by two accomplished bloggers that say I'm worthy of a Schmooze Award. Twisted Sister, Rex at Deer Camp and VW at One Happy Dog Speaks have thrice bestowed upon me this award. And I humbly accept...
“And what is the Power of Schmooze? It’s a blogging community involvement award for those bloggers who make the effort to connect and develop relationships in the blogosphere. Some leave great comments along the way, while others are faithful readers who’s presence you are aware of.”
And here are my 5 picks, not to exclude Twisted Sister, Rex of Deer Camp and VW of One Happy Dog Speaks. And of no particular order...
DNR - Since coming onto the blogoshpere scene, he quickly makes friends with his witty comments.
MrsJoseGoldbloom - Always leaves a comment that either makes you laugh or makes you think.
DragonLady - You never know what to expect from this one...She's had me laughing from day one.
Momma Mia - I've only known Meleah for a short time...but she's quick with her wit and provides support when needed.
Freddie - Always has time for conversation and always good for a laugh.
I consider these people I've bestowed this award to the 5 among my many friends here in the blogosphere. Each and every person that visits this site regularly should be given this award! Unfortunately, my hands would cramp and my brain would implode trying to write/link each and every one of you.
And I received yet another award. This one was bestowed upon me by The Coffee Table. She's a fellow Hoosier and she has a great blog. Here's what she said about Dazd Central:
Dazd of Dazed and Confused From Here. I never know what to expect from this guy. One day it's a silly picture with a "write a caption" contest. The next day it's a personal post. The next, it's a list of trivia. The next it's an informative article. I found this guy, believe it or not, by checking some of the unknown links on my statcounter. He had been lurking me and I didn't even know it, but I'm glad he was. He's a fellow Hoosier, so that makes him extra special.
See...I lurk and when I'm discovered its not only a surprise but makes me extra special...Ok Ok...because I'm a Hoosier. One can dream right?
I have already passed along this award in a previous post that I'm too lazy to find. It's in the archives somewhere and if anyone finds it, post the link in the comments and I'll update.
Knock-off Wednesday
Doris.
Doris, who?
Doris locked, that's why I had to knock!
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Tank!
Tank who?
You're welcome!
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Madam!
Madam who?
Madam foot is caught in the door!
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Old lady.
Old lady, who?
I didn't know you could yodel!
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Is there an owl in here?
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Woo.
Woo, who?
Don't get so excited, it's just a joke.
And there you have it folks! I've got more today but those will be later.
Happy Hump Day!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Offbeat Tuesday
The distance to the center of the Earth is 3,958 miles.
The Earth is farther away from the sun in July than in January.
The axial tilt of the Earth is 23.45 degrees.
The Earth's diameter is 7,926.68 miles, or 12,756.776 kilometers.
The deepest depression on the Earth is the Marianas Trench, at 35,798 feet deep, located in the Pacific Ocean.
The three types of plate boundaries are divergent boundaries, convergent boundaries, and transform boundaries.
The biggest and most destructive earthquake in the world since 1900 was in Chile on May 22, 1960, with a magnitude of 9.5 on the Richter Scale.
The biggest earthquake in the United States since 1900 was in Alaska on March 28, 1964, with a magnitude of 9.2 on the Richter Scale. This was also the second largest earthquake in the world.
The largest volcano in the world is Mauna Loa, located at the island of Hawaii, in the Pacific Ocean.
The tallest volcano in the world is Ojos del Salado in Chile. It is 22,589 feet (6,887 meter) tall.
If all the ice in the world was melted into water (some 5.5 million cubic miles) (23 million cubic kilometers), in all, the oceans would rise 1.7% percent, or about 180 feet (60 meters).
The world's smallest volcano is Mount Taal, located on the island Luzon, about 30 miles south of the Philippines' capital, Manila, which is about 1,310 feet high, where a building in Chicago is taller than.
Millions of years ago, all the land on Earth were together as one big island (continent), called Pangaea.
The world's worst earthquake occured in 1556 in China killing approximately 830,000 people.
The Earth's prime meridian is 24,859.731 miles long.
U.S. cities Los Angeles and San Francisco become about 2.5 inches closer to each other every year because they are on opposite sides of the St. Andreas Fault.
The Earth weighs (mass) 6,585,428,233,724,480,000,000 pounds (5,974,200,000,000,000,000,000,000 kilograms).
The weight of the Earth's crust is 23,600,000,000,000,000,000,000 kilograms.
The weight of the Earth's mantle is 4,050,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 kilograms.
The deepest valley is the Yarlung Zangbo valley in Tibet at an average 16,400 feet (5,000 meters) deep. The deepest point has been measured at 17,657 feet (5,382 meters).
Monday, July 16, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Caption Contest Winners
Crap...I forgot. My apologies...
First Place: "i don't care how many beers i drank,, the ladies just aren't getting any better looking!!!!" Paisley
Second Place: ...Which I suppose would mean the pasty white guy could be called... (I'm truly sorry for this, really I am!)
Ground-Chuck! Bitterroot
Third Place: Ahkmed isnpects his harem to see which ones are in estrus. Hammer
Honorable Mention: "Where's the beef?" Becky
Friday, July 13, 2007
Freaky Friday
I am gonna be very careful on word selection...
Ok...I was searching for next Thursday's Take-out post and
Either she is
Wonder how they are glued...
Friday Post
Have a great weekend!
Journey into the Unknown
I am walking down this road,
My soul burdens a heavy load,
Nowhere I look do I see,
The right place for me.
Present day makes no sense,
Past days leaves me tense,
Traveling down the road,
Lost and nowhere to go.
I look to the clouds so high,
Watch the birds as they fly,
Wonder what it’s like to be,
To be simple and free.
Both feet stride along the ground,
Even as my mind twirls around,
Thinking of nothing at all,
I stumble and take a fall.
Extract my body while in plight,
Soul gives an indescribable fight,
Slowly I weep a tear,
Though never looking back in fear.
I am walking down the road,
My soul burdens a heavy load,
Paradise is my destiny,
The right place for me.
Copyright © 2001 Dazdnconfzd
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Thursday Take-out
Ok folks...here's this weeks Thursday Take-out object. Leave your guesses in the comments.
Good Luck!
=====UPDATE=====
Ok..you all are smart! I guess I'm gonna have to invest more time in finding obscure things.
On the 2nd June 2005 this strange object was picked up off the foreshore at Yaverland. It is 16 centimetres long and 6 centimetres thick. Scientifically it is a coprolite, or fossil dinosaur dung (from the Greek Kopros = dung, and lite = mineral, from lithos = stone). It contains the digested remains of a bony meal eaten over 122 million years ago on the Isle of Wight. The lump would have dropped onto the ground as a large steaming heap, from a carnivorous dinosaur. Before it could be disturbed it was covered in mud and fossilized. It remained in the rock for millions of years, until it was found among the pebbles. The biggest lump is 6 centimetres in diameter. You can still see bits of smashed bone amongst the larger lumps which provides evidence that the dinosaur it came from was a carnivore. The coprolite has been given the Museum number IWCMS 2005.85, so it should be available for research for many years.
Trivia Thursday
I think I can survive until Thursdays. It will be rough but I've been through worse. Thursdays you ask? But Dazd...Thursdays are the Thursday Take-out posts, you know the ones you so lovingly refer to as the "WTF is It" posts. Yes it is...but folks, I'm doing one better. Yes thats right! Thursdays will be a 2 for 1 day! Two great posts in one day! I know...I know...tough to believe but its true.
Meleah and I have joined forces to offer you, my dear readers, a Sitcom Trivia post every Thursday. That's right...every Thursday! Ok...there are only so many sitcoms, but I'm guessing we'll branch out into movie trivia as well. So if your a TV Junkie, you need to check out this weeks 80's TV Trivia post. And if your a TV Junkie period, check out the main page. And...yes there's more folks. If you want to read some fine writing, please visit Meleah's main blog.
So mark your calendars for Thursdays! And make sure to bookmark Melevision for inside thoughts and views of TV.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Miss Aggie
Here she is finding the person in a building during a cold December day, 2005.
Her she is posing for a glamour shot in November 2005.
We have been participating in Search and Rescue within Indiana since September 2002. It's a lot of hard work both physical and mentally. The classes one must attend to reach the ranks of "worthy" is astounding in both topic and time required. The group I'm a member of is strictly volunteer...meaning we pay for everything from our own pockets. We also train our dogs from puppies and own them outright. A very daunting task for a beginner and sometimes even the seasoned trainer. We train in all types of conditons, both environmentally and meteorlogically. A lost person is still lost regardless of weather...rain, sleet, snow, rain and sunshine; we are there.
We were hoping to certify with a nationally accredited organization back in October. But that damn heart attack has probably set us back a year. She's ready to certify but the handler still needs his strength and endurance back. So it's looking like April of 2008 hopefully.
Now to something a little more serious. this is a dangerous job folks. Lots of things can happen out there. Hit the Read More button to view the memorial for a dear friend whose loss is felt around the Search and Rescue community. His demise was untimely and horrendous for anyone to witness or endure. We can only hope that his tragic event was quick and painless.
Just Kidding....hahaha You seriously thought I could write a post and NOT throw some humor in there?
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Tuesday Meme
1. Post the rules for the meme at the beginning of your post.
2. This meme consists of the blogger listing eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged in this post are to write their own post listing their own eight random items and list the rules.
4. At the end of the post/meme, list the folks you are tagging and leave them notice of such in their comments.
******************************************
1. I eat only one thing at a time...if my plate has corn, turkey, beans, etc...I eat only one thing until its gone then move to another item.
2. I cannot stand someone touching my toes!
3. I hate the dentist.
4. I cannot tolerate a dirty kitchen.
5. I do like cats although I belittle them here.
6. I do not have a college degree
7. I train a K-9 Search and Rescue dog.
8. I hate broccoli and cauliflower
Ok..tagging cmk, Cindi, Editor and DNR
Offbeat Tuesday
All polar bears are left-handed.
All porcupines can float in water.
An adult porcupine has approximately 30,000 quills on its body, which are replaced every year.
All snakes on the island of Tasmania are poisonous.
All the swans in England are property of the Queen.
Alligators can live for more than 100 years.
Amazon ants (red ants found in the western U.S.) steal the larvae of other ants to keep as slaves. The slave ants build homes for and feed the Amazon ants, who cannot do anything but fight. They depend completely on their slaves for survival.
An ant can survive for up to two days underwater.
An ant's sense of smell is as good as a Dog's.
An adult lion's roar can be heard up to five miles away, and warns off intruders or reunites scattered members of the pride.
An adult male ostrich, the world's largest bird, can weigh up to 345 pounds.
An elephant can smell water 3 miles away.
An elephant could carry up to 2 gallons of water in its trunk.
An elephant has 4 knees
An elephant may consume 500 pounds of hay and 60 gallons of water in a single day.
An elephant's trunk contains more than 50,000 muscles.
Monday, July 09, 2007
Did You Get an iPhone?
Posted: Monday, July 9 at 06:00 am CT by Bob Sullivan
While hundreds of thousands of eager consumers waited anxiously for the iPhone last week, most probably didn’t know about the hidden fee attached to their purchase.
Now the obvious question is this: With all the words spoken and written about the iPhone prior to launch, why didn't someone tell them?
The iPhone battery will only survive about 300-400 recharges, the company says. Because the unit is sealed, consumers can't swap out dead batteries. Instead, dead phones must be sent to Apple, where battery replacement will take three business days and cost $79 plus a $6.95 shipping charge. Those who can't live without their cell phones for those three days can rent a spare iPhone for $29.
This pricey, and apparently inevitable, aftercharge never made it into any of the voluminous news stories written and filmed about the iPhone prior to its launch on June 29. Why not?
read whole story here
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Caption Contest Winners
First Place:"Stare deep into my eyes and I will heepnotize you. And then I will open my mouth...for the strawberry, of course!" cmk
Second Place: Think you're big enough to take this strawberry from me? Bing it on, pu$$y!" Walrilla
Third Place: Cat: "Lookey there; lunch and dessert!" BobG
As a bonus...Hit the "Read More" button for a slogan campaign. Leave you slogan in the comments as well. I would say this pic is NSFW. The winning captions are below.
I really need to stop searching for stuff.
First Place: Announcer: with Puma you can get ahead.. Marloes
Second Place:"Puma: We also make belts that coordinate with our stylish shoes and handbags. As you can see, our sales representatives will he happy to measure you for a belt today!
Why, what were you thinking?" Ambulance Driver
Third Place: "What's that on my thigh? Why, uhhh, it's mayonnaise. Yes, that's what it is. We were making sandwiches." Sarcasticynic
Friday, July 06, 2007
Friday Funnies
Make sure to visit Melevison: TV Junkie this weekend. We have allied to produce a weekly TV Trivia game with prizes. Here is this weeks Trivia Game revolving around Happy Days! I found it tough to create the questions and answers, hopefully you'll find it challenging as well! Good Luck!
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Thursday Take-out
Ok folks...here's this weeks Thursday Take-out object. Leave your guesses in the comments. I need its Archaeological name and date of origin.
Good Luck!
****UPDATE****
The Phaistos Disc.
This strange object was unearthed in the ruins of the ancient city of Phaistos, in Crete, in 1908. Numerous mysteries surround the Disc's origin and meaning, which has apparently not yet been conclusively deciphered. (Claims of deciphering have been advanced, with some claiming the Disc's writing is a prayer, while others maintain that it is a mathematical proof. Details here and here.) The Disc's nature is mysterious partly because no other similar artifacts have ever been found, and because the nature of the characters inscribed on the Disc -- showing little, if any, variation -- imply that the Disc may actually have been "struck" as an example of ancient typography. The Disc dates to 1700 BC.
Nice job BobG and Mrs. J.!
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
July 4th Humor
Ok...I had hoped to write a traditional July 4th post. But folks...I ran across something that made me cry. Oh not tears of sadness but ones of extreme laughter. Do not venture past the "Read More" button if you don't have a damn good sense of humor. k?
Please, for the love of all humanity, do NOT try this at home!
So here we have two friends getting together to enjoy some booze and fireworks. What could possibly go wrong?
Here we see Johnny obviously enjoying himself. While we all cringe at the possibilities here, Johnny seems to be joyous over the fact he drew the short straw. He also has his eye on the prize bottle of booze.
Here Johnny is getting nervous as Bob steps away from him. He's thinking that maybe this ain't a bright idea after all. Bob assures him everything is good and the rocket will not provide him with a fiery enema.
OMG!!! Johnny just realizes this ain't good! He cannot decide if it was the 3x BBQ wings or the pint of hot salsa and chips.
Poor Poor Johnny...stupidity at its finest. Johnny will never live this down, and for that matter sit down for a long time. Bob on the other hand made off like a bandit. Not only did he keep the bottle of booze...but he has pictures posted all over the Internets!
Fireworks: $15
Booze: $10
Pictures of your friend launching fireworks from his ass: Priceless
Offbeat Tuesday
The color of a flower attracts the insect or bird that's required to pollinate the plant. Red blooms lure butterflies and hummingbirds; blue, violet and purple blossoms tend to entice bees.
In the early 1990s, paint manufacturers offered four hundred to six hundred colors. Ten years later, that number grew to nearly sixteen thousand, according to the Paint Quality Institute.
The avocado-colored kitchen appliances that proliferated in the 1970s were a reaction to the psychadelic colors of the 1960s.
Warm colors stand out to the human eye, which is the reason signs and signals warning of potential danger tend to be yellow or red.
School busses in the United States are Chrome Yellow and used to be Omaha Orange.
A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
Ants cannot chew their food, they move their jaws sidewards, like a scissor, to extract the juices from the food.
On an American one-dollar bill, there is an owl in the upper left-hand corner of the "1" encased in the "shield" and a spider hidden in the front upper right-hand corner.
A baby eel is called an elver, a baby oyster is called a spat.
H/T to reader Michelle for providing some of todays trivia!
Monday, July 02, 2007
Monday Odd News
ACCUSED.. OF HAVING SEX WITH HIS BIKE
A MAN has been charged with having sex with his bike.
Robert Stewart was allegedly caught in the act by two terrified cleaners who walked into his bedroom in a hostel.
Stewart has denied the accusation, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.
That would make him a pedalphile, no?
=========
Illinois man files suit over lost love
CHICAGO - Stealing someone's heart can cost you: Just ask German Blinov. A Cook County jury ordered Blinov to shell out $4,802 last week after he was sued by a husband from a Chicago suburb for stealing the affections of the man's wife.
Arthur Friedman used a little-known state law to mount the legal attack against Blinov. The alienation of affection law, one of eight across the country, lets spouses seek damages for the loss of love.
What happened to the good ole days when you just beat the crap outta someone?
========
Man dies on stand testifying about death of California girlfriend
ROME – An Italian accused of killing his American girlfriend after he kidnapped their daughter suffered a heart attack and died on the stand Monday as he testified in court for the first time, his lawyer said.
Carlo Ventre, 59, was pronounced dead at the scene by ambulance crews called to the Rome courtroom, attorney Roberto Leonardo said.
I'm thinking someone served justice the old fashioned way.
Caption It!
Leave your captions in the comments. Winners will be announced Friday!
As a bonus...Hit the "Read More" button for a slogan campaign. Leave you slogan in the comments as well. I would say this pic is NSFW.
I really need to stop searching for stuff.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Caption Contest Winners
First Place: "Like I said, your badass attitude is getting unbearable" Graham
Second Place: "Everybody was kung-fu fightin', Those cats were fast as lightnin'" Walrilla
Third Place: "WAIT! Let me clarify ... I said it does NOT make your butt look fat!" Sarcasticynic
Honorable Mention: "Ok...just calm down..calm down..she meant nothing to me..I swear you're the only one for me baby..." Insanity Suits Me